My Feelings, My Thoughts

2007-02-01T11:56:00.000+08:00

The ugly face of our society

It's undeniable that it's a wonderful nation. But to me, it's cruel. I did made this judgement just because it favors me in anyway. One will not understand how it feels to witness the cruelty us, people have done to the animals around us. Learning biodiversity and ecolocy in school has really open my eyes which i had not realise before this.

Tears flow my eyes as i witness a dog pounder capture a poor dog and drag it by its neck all the way on the rough tar road. I "good looking" man in his mid-twenties came walking soundlessly to the coffee shop where just some minutes ago where i was having my breakfast. There was a dog whithout an owner - stray dog. Lying down peacefully beside a motorcycle. It was always very friendly with the children. Lately, it has been eating plants as it wasn't feeling well. This is due to the capture of it's puppies not long ago. Hey! Dogs have feelings too! The black hearted man easily sweing the rod with a rope at its end around its neck. The cries let out was a torture to me! He was walking above normal speed and drag it all the way. By passers just stood and watched. What can we do? It's their job. We cannot stop them regardless whatever cruel thing they did. It was mere barking - helpless ly. At one point, it coundn't catch up with his speed and its body plumetted on the ground. At that moment how i wish that other dogs come along and attack that man! What that man did was ignore and continued his "job" mercilessly. At Dog pounder - what a noble job isn't it? Helping our society to clear out stray animals - mainly dogs. i would like to question our authorities... when will they start capturing stray cats?

One time more than enough. Have those people no compassion? Stray animals problems arise because of us. it's us who caused all these. And yet, have anyone ever blame themselves or dig into the root of these problems and at least try to solve it from where it started? We are such consider ourselves as such GREAT creatures that we never reflect on the faults we've done.

Dog been whacked till it loses its jaw has to be removed...
Authorities stomped into citizen's house and start shooting at the dogs...
Kid been attacked by dog, but all the blame goes to the poor dog which cannot voice out...

Other than being cruel, is there really no other ways to solve stray dogs problem?
What about stray cats?

However, i guess all these questions will remain as questions and shall never be answered.
Well, our authorities have plenty other "important" subjects to discuss.
They will only defend themselves.
Have you ever think about that?
Defend.
We can speak to defend ourselves...
What about those that can't?
As the occupant of the highest rank, above all creatures in our sea of biodiversity, let us speak for those who can't speak for themselves.

2006-12-01T21:47:00.000+08:00

10 Things A Mother Would Think For Their Teenage Daughter Concerning "Boyfriend".
Recently, i've been quite rebellious against my mother. In various of aspect, one which concern most mothers is about their teenage daughters having a boyfriend. Seriously, at first, i didn't believe. However, it is proven that, PARENTS, especially mothers, most of them have the SAME thinking. These are some of the stuff that they wish us to know... - trust me, many of us already realise these =S

1. Never limit yourself (there's plenty of guys available out there) - you're only 18...
2. Never give in too much feelings in a relationship
3. Always remember that you have your attractive points which can get better guys
4. Bear in mind that if a guy dumped you, it's his loss
5. Keep to your principles
6. Never forget your morality
7. It's not the end of the world if you break up
8. Keep it to one and not a bunch...
9. Treasure yourself
10. Keep a small little distance between you and your boyfriend (never cross the line girl)

No offense. Perhaps for some, all these are craps. But will we know what's on our parents mind until we become parents ourselves? How much they worry for us... When will we understand? No idea. Till now, i still think that sometimes, they just simply worry too much. Haha... We do know more that they thought we know... =) Ja.

2006-12-01T16:43:00.000+08:00

I'm Idioticly Confused
I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. I'm confused. And so... I'm bloody confused.

2006-11-29T23:38:00.000+08:00

So sudden - i'm sorry =(
It's been cold since quite sometime ago...2 or 3 days maybe. However in my life, i tend to make decisions very suddenly, without considering what others will think about that particular matter i've decided. I have countless problems with many many people. Well, i created most of 'em. Came to think of it, the first day i'm "involved" in a relationship, is the day where i also lied to my parents. Once it began, it'll never stop. Haha wa never really like the fact that i'm actually in a relationship. It all began when i asked for permission from her along with the phrase " i'll never get serious, i just want to experience it." It's really unfair to the other party, i know. I've just never told him about this before. In fact, i didn't even expect it to last this long. Time flies. It's been more or less ten months since. All this while, i'm not even certain if i really enjoyed all those time we spent. I can't deny that going out just the two of us makes me worry. I was very worried that some one will see us and tell my mom. I was so afraid that i became very observant. One day, it finally happened. Unconsciously bumped into some friend of my mom's. I have to say that i just dislike nosy people. Must they tell every single detail they saw to my parents. Anyway, it's still my problem and it's none of their business. i wish i can just tell those unnecessary people to back off! It made me furious and even more afraid when my mom actually came home and asked me about it. She had never accepted the fact that i had a "boyfriend" and do not wanna care much about it. I was such a paranoia that i start assuming many outcomes from my various action. Assuming things that others have never thought of it and accusing that they've thought so just because i think so. Hard headed. I never listen to advices. Perhaps to respect the party talking i might just hear but never considered what had been delivered to me. And so, a few days ago, i had another argument. With who you know...mom. Other than that, my attitude changed drastically. I have no respect for people around me. I just act on my mood without taking into account other people's feeling. It's been really hard. Getting into a relationship at the wrong time is such a difficult thing to do - for me. I feel as if things that i do are always not right some where. i'm so afraid that i will do the "wrong" thing. What's wrong with me? I've become such a paranoia. My attitude change to the worse was some related to him... that's what my mom think. He follows whatever i want and i guess i've let myself become a spoilt brat. I takes it out with countlessly whoever is standing before me. Including mom and dad. I've become so rude to people. I won't blame this on anyone but myself. It's me who allow myself to turn in to a "useless daughter" just like how my mom will say it. And so, finally, i've made things turn out the worst when my own mother cannot tolerate with me. She said... " i don't know how to be your mom anymore. Don't call me mom." I made her tears fall. What kind of daughter am i?! It's been very hard for me when she did not talk to me for a day. It's been torturing! She says that if i do not want her to care about me, then she won't care at all. Sigh i just can't live with that. What kind of person am i that my own mother chooses to ignore me?! Well, what can i say, i bring it upon myself. It's all my fault. I cannot fulfil one's desire in a relationship. To me, relationship is real simple and casual. There's many things i cannot do. I'm not allowed to and i know where i stand. I clearly understand what i can and cannot do. However, for now, a companion is all i need. I rather have it casual. Thus, i have decided and i will never look back. I cannot stop people from what they want to do but at least i can stop myself from what i'm not supposed to do now. Have i been true? Yes, i have been. My feelings are never fake and i didn't expect myself to give in so much. This time is very much harder than my first attempt to break us apart. Perhaps, i really did put in some effort after all...sub-consciously. When somethngs gonna happen, it's gonna happen. Time is all that counts. I hope that i didn't hurt him that much. I only can say sorry and nothing else. Please focus on your coming exam ok. Do keep your promise. Anyway, life goes on... if i want to type in every single detail, i'll need not sleep tonight. Haha... bye.

2006-11-24T00:04:00.000+08:00

I've never thought about it~
It was an accident which some how occur. The result of terribly bad luck i guess. It's now gone with only two front feet left but it STILL can move around! Of course there will be some difficulties. I brought it back to save it. So i've never thought about putting it to sleep. Some how, putting one which is actually eating well and is considered as a healthy one except the injuries to sleep is cruel. Eventhought some places do that quite often. However, that's when we are left with no choice. It's still young... There's still hope. I'll never give as long as there's still hope. If it's eating perfectly, there's hope for it to heal. Anyway, this can't be compared with human's feeling. Human's desire are simply just too much. And~ i'm visiting the vet real soon. =) As long as it is kept clean, well taken care... i believe that it will heal. When i feed others, it will squeak - which means it wants to eat too ^^. It's really CUTE!!! When you see them eat, it's the type of cuteness feeling you cannot imagine. (i might sound a bit crazy but it's true.) I love to see them eat. ^^ totemo kawaii desu yo! Hehe... now it's in intensive care unit~ Run by my sister and i! It's like a baby. I do hope that some one out there can truly understand how i feel. Support is all i need right now~ no offense. I'll get a cam and snap some picture of the cute pigs i have and post it here... but god knows how long this will take XD hehe... ja ne.

2006-11-17T18:11:00.000+08:00

No choice but to lose another leg~
T___________________T
Thanks to Eva, i found a not-too-expensive vet today. She refers it as "chan" doctor. Haha XD. Anyway, thanks to that vet, i can finally bring my injured guinea pig to have a proper check up. It only costs RM15. She also got her medicine. 3 times a day... i have to feed her with her medicine. NOW, i really feel like a mom with 6 kids! It's my daily work already. Feed them, change their litter and now, nurse them. I'm really giving my best to the lil' guinea pig. I named her POTATO. Haha. Don't ask me why. That time, potato came across my mind and so it is. POTATO. Anyway, UNO and POTATO are both in my house till POTATO is completely healthy and healed only. I'll have to return them to my aunt after that as i can't afford to have so many. Currently, i have 4 guinea pigs, 2 bunnies and 1 hamster. My sister's hamster just passed away recently. It's really not easy to take care of so many when it's mainly only me doing all the work. I'm very clear about myself too. I'm not realy a homely person. But due to lack of $$, i have no choice but to stay at home. I guess it's time for me to be a good girl and stay at home more often. Study. I must never forget to remind myself everyday that my main responsibility is to study. Set a goal and give out all your best to achieve it. Anyway, the vet is very friendly. According to him, it'll have to lose it's remaining back leg. After that, the only way for POTATO to move around is wih the aid of her front legs or arm, that is by crawling. T_T Poor thing. I feel so sorry for her. If i were to save her remaining back injured leg, i'll have to spend more than RM200 for an operation in Serdang. I seriously have no money for that. And even if i'm willing to do so, my parents won't allow me. It's no a matter of no compassionate but money. Even the vet says, you better get a new guinea pig. Logically thinking and relistically, that's what most of us will do. People rather buy an injection for their ill pets so that they can be put to sleep than spending money to cure them. Still, be safe than sorry. People who own pets, make sure that they are really commited to the responsibility which comes after buying those oh-so-cute animals. Neglecting and abandoning their pets if nothing that anyone can tolerate with. POTATO, heal soon! *Prays*

2006-11-17T11:35:00.000+08:00

TATSUKETE KUDASAI!!! (I NEED HELP!!!)
Recently i adopted a baby guinea pig from my aunt's place. It was born as a normal and healthy guinea pig. Unfortunately, one of it's feet got stuck in between the steel cage and it's not broken. She eventually, bit off that feet of hers because it turned black and is dead. Left with 3 legs, the remaining back leg of hers is again - broken. It is not entire broken. It's bone it actually sticking out from the side. I think the feet is now attached to the body with the aid of her veins only. Recently, the other broken leg (bit off) got stuck in between the cage again. Now, both back legs are swelling badly. We couldn't abandon it as it's still eating. The upper part of her body is still perfectly normal. Due to it's back legs' severe injuries, it couldn't stand properly to pee and poo. The pee makes her butt always wet and dirty. I plan to bring her home so that she can heal sooner ( my aunt keep her guinea pigs outdoor ) as it's raining everyday. The weather is very damp lately. However, after 3 days, it's condition is not getting any better. we suspect that it's a result of an attack from the cats nearby. Unfortunatey, as a student myself, i have no income. I CANNOT afford to being her to a vet as it will cost too much due to her severe injury. Is there anyone out there who is willing to help me? It's will be very saddening if it has to be abandoned and let to die... It's already suffering now. Please, whoever who knows any place or any vet which does not cost very much, inform me. My email address is ayaharriet@hotmail.com. Thank you very much. Domo arigato. Ja.

2006-11-15T12:40:00.000+08:00

Momo is such a darling
I'm a sucker for cute animals especially bunnies! XD
Yesterday we went to Kok Aquarium again. This time i went with Ridz, Sam, ZiewCh and Suerial. Hehe. Main pursose : Buy fishing net to catch hexapod insects. XD. Then i just can't help myself but stomp to where they keep the rabbit and brought Sam along too ^^. Guess what?! There were a few Lion Heads there again!!! There's this one mix colour one... It's Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo KAWAII! So adorable and innocent. How i wish i can bring it home -.-" My mom would LIKE it. Haha. It's just too cute. However, i managed to control myself. ><" It was hard alright. Very hard indeed. I've been thinking about it for the next hour! ><" Totemo kawaii desu yo! Lol... now i understand why this person in the website i visited where she have sooooo many bunnies in her house. She just can't stand bringing them home when she saw them - kinda similiar with me o.o But i'm so sorry that her bunnies all died due to a food poisoning. It must be devastating for her as they leave her one by one. It's all the irresponsible bunny food manufacturer's fault. More than 10 of her bunnies and all of 'em were breeded ones and so adorable! it's a pity that the became victims of those irresponsible party. Since the, i've been very careful in buying food for my Bunny. Anyway, here's my Momo's picture. I took over Eva's guinea pig - Uno... Now, i can't decide if i should give her back to my aunt because Momo is such a darling. She licks her and lies with her.... So CUTE! Presenting... Momo-chan. I have only 2 pictures.. =(

Momo on my lap.... She was so small and cute... and very black indeed.. i can't spot her in her cage at night~ too dark =/

Momo~ ^^

2006-11-13T19:57:00.000+08:00

Kanashii
Death visits so sudden. I just got back a mere baby guinea pig from Eva's house today and guess what... Just a while ago, my sister's hamster died. God knows how it happened. It's just all too sudden. Well, this is not the first time my sister's pet hamster falls down from my house's "mini" balcony though. So this time, we can cope with it better... It's not we are cruel or cold blooded. There were no tears somehow~ But we are still very sad! We have no idea at all how it managed to open the cage door... And ~ the next thing we know, some one from downstairs came up to our house and ask, " Is this yours? I think it's still alive." Yes indeed it was alive then. *Blink blink* not even 5 minutes passed and it died. Internal bleeding i suppose because there were blood emmiting from it's rectum. You should look at it's expression when we got it when it was still alive. It's like suffering from severe injuries. Perhaps the legs are broken. Its so... Pitiful! T_T Watery eyes and all. It's yet still so innocent. Frankly speaking, it's better for it to die instantly. If it managed to survive, it will be even worse. It has to suffer. Poor thing. We are now left with one hamster, 3 guinea pigs and 2 rabbits. May god bless it's soul. ( animals have soul too). May it rest in peace. I can't even remember what's its name yet !! T________T It's so damp nowadays... Makes me feel uncomfortable~ (out of topic) . Ja.

2006-11-09T17:57:00.000+08:00

Why always dogs and not cats?
Mar***** it is that's why. The authorities are always after street dogs but NEVER go after stray cats when they are actually roaming aroung the neighbourhood. Is it a belief that dogs can bite and hurt people while cats are harmless? You tell me. Cases there have been. No one can deny. A nine year old child was attacked by a Rottweiler (sorry if wrong spelling) a few years back made dog a "dangerous and harmful" creature. But like other animals, they won't attack unless they are attacked first. This does not include any mistreated dogs who has gone psycho or trained to attack people though. They kid were traumatised - true. But the dog was ... killed. Who actually saw whatever that happened? Just because animal can't speak, all the blames are thrown on them. They cannot protect themselves verbally. The only thing that they are capable to do is physically protect themselves. 13 dogs shot down by the authority for no particular reason. Define justice. Is animal have no justice at all? Who's standing on their side? When a citizen has too many dogs, action are taken. How about citizen with more than 10 cats? Can they be ignored? A person who wants to get a dog have to get permission from his left, right, front, back and everyone who stay near him! And of course permission from many parties too. How about a person who wants to get a cat? He could just go to the pet shop and get one. Sim-ly get a license and there he goes... Easily. Fair? When the majority say there's nothing wrong with this system, then there's nothing wrong with it. I shouldn't go too far on this as some people might take it as a sensitive issue. However, animals need our help. They are to be protected not harmed.

2006-11-09T10:59:00.000+08:00

Stick to the past and you'll never improve.
Looking back. That's what i've been doing for most of the time. I know i can't turn back and it's useless keep on sticking to the past. Sometimes, i keep on thinking how did i did some impressive things back then which me myself couldn't believe that i actually did it. Nevertheless, i also don't know why i make decisions which i'm living with it now. Looking back is ok sometimes but too much will just cause depression. The more i think back the worse i feel. Came to think of it, what tt said was right afterall. I only blog when i have problems. Can't deny it now. I simply can't stop myself from thinking how i did this, how i did that back then... i used to be... these common words is what i always say... i used to be... seriously i used to be a much better person compared to the me now. I was cheerful, friendly, positive ... for whatever reason, it was very very much better than who i am now. i have been really pessimistic lately and depressed. Not the very serious type but i have never feel happy... Even if there is happiness, it's very rare. i do not feel the joy when i'm with whoever i'm with at that particular time. Whem i'm with my family, i'm even worse. When someone place a stranger before me, i'll look at him and think about his past. I will be thinking about what have he/she gone through to be who he/she is now... Struggling. I have lost ineterest in countless stuff where i used to enjoy doing 'em very much. However, what i still have interest in is almost impossible for me to do it as i'm not financially supported. Other than that, worrying about my cash never fails to bother me. Can say, i'm quite a spendthrift. Anyway, i just can't help myself from thinking back eventhough i know i shouldn't. It's doing no good. However, perhaps it's because i'm not really satisfied with myself. No one but myself can help myself. At time, remaining silent is the best solution... At least i think so...

2006-11-07T17:55:00.000+08:00

Tears went dry...
I was having my worst moment ever lately.
Hopefully, it will end today.
Anyway, no matter what happened, i sincerely thank Kelvn for being there always.
Thank you for listening to me crap. ^^"
I cried all day yesterday and seriously, i can't cry anymore. Perhaps, it's a way for me to let go all the unwanted stress which i created. I had a haircut and i think that it was disasterous. Anyway, when i leave it alone, at times, it's actually quite ok. I'm still not very satisfied but what can i say?! It's my own decision to cut it. Hmmm... You know, it's really stupid of me. Maybe not only me but many out there... sometimes, we can't find a reason for us to continue living. At times, everything just turn wrong suddenly and nothing seems right then. You felt as if it's hopeless and nothing could be done to save you. At times like this, a caring person is very very important. There is no need of nice-to-hear words, no need of consolation or advice... only a listening ear is more than enough. When some one is down of over-stressed or depressed, she really feel like giving up. As for me, i've been through that situation countless times. I used to get better after being scolded by my mom =] But not anymore. My mom cannot bare with me anymore~ Imagine that! How terrible i can get?! Sub-consciously i'm actually disturbing others by behaving like a brat. Insist on everything i want and decline brutally on everything that doesn't please me. Showing faces is what i do most often. I'm unhappy or not pleased when i;m wit my family... actually came to think of it, i feel unhappy and down with alomost everyone and tend to be very silent. I prefer to be left alone at times like that. i do not wish that to happen but everything that appears on my mind is bad. I only noticed people's bad qualities and the good ones are totally being ignored. Advices are too ignored. Moody one whole day and pessimistic is what i am being. When the situation became more serious, i couldn't even sleep well! I'll look like a zombie. We cannot escape having times like this but it depends on us on how we deal with it. There isn't really an exact way but to face it... I just don't know what to say. I hope mine's really gone but i know the history will repeat itself one day~ ^^... Perhaps my way is to cry out loud. ^^" Till my eyes swell =S It's not a good feeling though after you dry. Striked by tired-ness and the bags under my eyes, grew even more rapidly.Trust me, you don't wanna look at me at times like that~ ><"

2006-11-07T17:42:00.000+08:00

Diarrhea? Diarrhae? Which one? I forgot~
Gomen if it's not the correct spelling ~
It's attacking my Bunny again!
I think it's my fault though. =( I shouldn't let her eat wnything she desires and control her diet. But she loves that particular " green balls " so much that i can't hep myself but to let her have it. Sigh. Saddening. Now she's having diarrhea. What am i going to do?! I have not enough cash to bring her to a Vet. My dad would LOVE it if i bring her to one. Wasting money is all he will say. He's cold blooded! ><" Prevention is better than healing. I totally agree. It's awful. My bunny's droppings are so soft and slimy that it does not at all resembles a rabbit's dropping. What's worse is she poo outside of her cage and the floor of my mini-balcony... You won't want to see it. =]. That's not all! Her poos are so soft that it stucked to her butt-fur. Her tail, underneath it, is covered with her droppings. Soft, slimy, stinking poo. Although i'm used to rabbit's droppings but this is just too much. She lost weight too. What am i going to do?! Is she suffering a terrible stomach ache? I don't know. Is she very sick? I don't know also... *Sigh*. All that i can do now is restrict her from eating those "unsuitable" food stuff and feed her more alfafa. I actually have to clean her butt now. Her fur are all stuck together. Later today, i have to cut 'em off. ><" Learn a lesson. Give your best to your pet. Take care of them peoperly before it's too late. By the way, i have a new rabbit! Another rabbit which my BUnny dislikes her very much and occasionally attacks her. *sobs* Poor thing. Her name is MOMO and her pictures will be updater in future. ^^ Hopw that my Bunny will heal soon and hope that she will accept MOMO and never bite her again~ Sayonara *Prays*

2006-11-07T17:17:00.000+08:00

It's Seven-Eleven
Have you noticed that's seven-eleven today? It's kinda nice i thought. Special - well that's because we have this 24 hours store...Suerial actually questioned if seven-eleven have cheap sale today =S... Haha. It's been forever since i come online and blogged!
Well... my days were packed with exams and after exams was my holiday which i make full use of it. Then, as usual, the cycle never fails to repeat itself. Stress, holiday then depression strikes. Today, finally i got back all my results. And as expected it was horrible. Disasterous. Well, what do i expect to achieve with my never-ending-procastinating attitude? Last minute studies and i should be glad that i actually did not fail. C,C,B,B,B+. That's what i managed to score. I realised that, in form 6, you really HAVE to fail in order to fail your exams. Well, i'm glad it's over and so is my down period. I was forcing myself very hard. Literally, the more i try, the worse i get. Let's not raise this topic. I know i'm not alone. Despite stayin at home, i rather go to school. Now, lately, especially yesterday and today, going to school is to release tension. Seriously! I have never enjoyed my school days as much as this since i started off in BB. Ah... hehe it's not the school that matters. it's my friends! =) i do feel better after we had fun together. For once, forget about all those life-taking papers and good grades. Today to, i had my best chem practical ever. It all sailed through smoothly today. =) I can't deny though; my redings wasn't that good but who cares. Haha. I'm satisfied with it. That's all it counts. Satisfaction. I guess my blog won't be that dead anymore. Hopefully. =) Ja ne.

2006-09-27T14:33:00.000+08:00

I voluntarily did this tag...

-Single or taken?
What's with the word taken?! I enjoy my freedom being me... and i enjoy being controlled at time by certain people. Not overprotected...

-Are you happy wif ur life now?
Frankly, not really. There's some particular reason~

-When you meet the right person, do you fall in love with him/her fast?
When do i know that he's the right person? It has to be at the right time too ^^

-Have you ever had ur heart broken?Learnt A lesson?
So far, not yet.

-Do you believe there are some circumstances where cheating love is acceptable?
Never betray anyone's trust in you.

-Would you take someone back if he cheats on you?
Time and sincerity will tell...

-Have you ever talk about marriage with another before?
Generally, yes. Personally, no.

-Do you want children?
Having children doesn't mean you have to give birth... But, i'm not really into children =)

-How many?
If i really have to answer, two it shall be.

-Would you ever consider adoption?
Yeah...why not?!

-If someone likes you right now,what do you think is the best way to let you know his/her feelings?
I don't trust confessing neither through sms nor msn. Not even phone call. Have the courage dude. XD

-Do you enjoy getting into relationships?
At times, yes.

-Be honest. what is the furtherest thing you and ur ex did?
Haha... don't have ex. There's nothing i can do~ Too bad~

-Do you believe in love at first sight?
Er... i'm just being realistic. No.

-Are you romantic?
Me? I've been said that i'm a robot... You tell me.

-Do you believe you can change someone?
Until i have that confidence, i'll say yes... But currently, i don't know.

-If you could get married somewhere, where would it be?
I've never thought about it...

-Do you give in easily when you're fighting?
I argue. I don't fight. Same principle. I don't really give in. In fact, so far...never gave in...

-Do you have feelings for someone right now?
Perhaps. =)

-Do you ever wished that you could have someone but you messed it up?
Erm... I don't think so. I take no first step. =)

-Have you ever broken a heart?
Many i guess... Conscious and unconsciously....

-If one day ur best fren falls in love wif the person u are deeply in love wif, what will you do?
I'm willing to step out if it's worth it... You'll know what you'll need to do when you're at that position then...

-Are you missing someone right now?
Maybe... =)

-Who is on your mind that you wish to tag now?
Oh... Plenty! =D
Kousalia, Tik Tsin, Samantha, Eva, Pauline, Kwang Hua please be obedient and do your tag ok ?! =D hehehe... Ja!

2006-09-27T14:00:00.000+08:00

Just another day
After having approximately 6 periods of biology today, i finally can head home. Reached home at around 1.30 p.m. On the way, things happened. I went to pick up my lunch from Kelvn's and literaly have tt staring at me for some time before i relise that i have to send him home. I totally missed the junction. Had to reverse. Bang... That's it. I reversed with all my might and had the back of my car to knock the road divider. Being as crazy as i am, i still managed to laugh at it. Anyway, finally i reached home. Lifthed up my head. There's her butt! Golden brown furs sticking out from the squares of the fence. She loves the air. The wind. So do i. That's my precious. Well... carried all my books, leaves, bottle, and not to forget, my lunch... with LOVE one that is according to tt. Went up the same numbers of stairs i've been going up and down for the past decade. Life is challenging some say... But so far, mine is boring. Well there are times~ *breath down deep and hard* HUH! Dumped my bags and books... Headed straight to the table cheerfully and took out a very cute lunch box~ I knew that that will make questions arise... " Needless to say it's from Kelvn." Indeed it is. A day is never complete without nagging huh?! Although it may be true...but i still don't like it. Not at all. Not even if it's an advise. I'm being such a baby here... In fact, sometimes, i am. Acting like a spoiled brat. Me myself is not fond of it at all. But at times, you tend to make things hard for people. Just for the irritating fun of it. I have talk and talk and talk about it... Arguments, tears ... etc etc and yet, i still don't seem to understand. Of course i found out that i'm never alone. My sentence always starts with BUT and end with the exact same word too without anything in between. Lately, i have lost interest in many things. However, slowly i'm recovering. Gaining the urge to push myself step ahead. Life has to go on whether you like it or not. The only way to stop it? Is death. It's ridiculous to think about that right now. I just like this story i read... Honey, Baby, Sweetheart.Yeah i don't deny that the title itself makes the book sounds like another typical love novel.. But this time, i shall say do not judge a book by it's cover. Very true. Serious... for some reason i like it very much. And phrases like " Walk with DOG and you'll never get lost " tickles me everytime i come across them in the book. Hmmm... i guess i feel much better after i blog and a pig likeme cannpot afford to miss my daily sweet nap. Frankly, my sleep in the afternoon is much better than the night ones... Lol.. no idea why. It's just like that i guess. Well, consider less, less problem. The currently me, cannot handle problems properly as i used to be. Sayonara.

2006-09-23T12:53:00.000+08:00

Mid-Autumn Festival
Is that what Mooncake Festival called in the proper way? One chapter represents one year. I have eighteen and the for the first few chapter... i'm just a shy and silent girl who knows nothing. Then, it is always called "chung chiu jie" it is then in cantonese of course. Then... intermediate chapters, i was exposed to the english version which it is known as Mooncake Festival... Then it is more widely known as Lantern Festival... Till last night... then, i relise that it is also called the Mid-Autumn Festival. Heheh... call me an idiot with very narrow english knowledge or whatsoever. Honestly, i'm not really exposed to english terms of loads of things. However... well you never can stop learning can't you... XD Alright i'm basically crapping. Ignore me. Last night i actually performed at Sunway College. i can't believe myself. I had last-minute-nervousness. I kinda forgot most of my steps. And as the result? I made a few mistakes. Obvious or not i don't know. I almost lost my balance. Thank God i didn't trip and fall. Anyway... let's cut the crap and go to the main point. A few of my 'friends' or better known as aquintances are going to perform during a Lantern Festival on September 30th. At night that is. At the basketball court behind the Chinese Temple. My friends... who live near enough, please do come. It'll be lots of fun. Just like the previous year. I'm helping out there so...do come yeah... There'll be loats of games and excitement... Those who submitted their SPM 2005 result slip too... We have a suprise for you guys...SO... PLEASE TURN UP... You guys know who you are. That's all.. See ya.
p/s : i don't quite know the time yet but be conscious and look around you.. i guess there'll be some banners up soon or maybe flyers...

2006-09-14T21:33:00.000+08:00

4 days school, 3 days off ?
For the past 3 weeks, i've been schooling for only 4 days a week. It seems that every Friday i'm absent - for some reason. Seriously, my Fridays are wasted every week! Look at my time table, it pulls me back to bed whenever i manage to wake up on Friday mornings. hehe... I only have one period of chemistry, and one periob of bio. Others? 2 periods are free, while those left are occupied by MUET and PA. These two subjects seems to be the most boring ever! Ok...it's not the subject that is boring; it's the way my teacher conduct the class which makes it time-to-sleep class. I'm just being frank. Seriousy, my current PA and MUET teacher, do not teach. Whether she really can teach or not... i can't tell. She has taught us nothing. Presentation is her favourite. Every lesson, every week, we present. It's really lame and we're getting sick of it. It's not we are complaining - well i am kinda complaining... I'm bored in her class. Sigh... but what can we do? To be mnore percise, what can i do? We're lack of teachers and she's the one we've got... That's one of the reason why i only go to school 4 days a week. However, my chemistry teacher seems to recognise me... -.-"Because of that, i have to drag myself to school everyday...including lame Fridays...
Hehe..
Since she's absent tomorrow... So i shall be absent too...
Have fun my classmates...Tata =)

2006-09-08T22:02:00.000+08:00

It's Daddy's Birthday!
Okay... this one is delayed for almost one month. Was supposed to be posted on August 18th but... as i said, i don't have the urge to blog recently. Hehehe... It was my dad's birthday last month. As long as i can remember i think this is the first time i gave my dad a card. Usually, i'll spend all my money on mom's birthday and mother's day present. But, this year...i did spend on mom's birthday present, but i saved the mother's day present money for dad's birthday instead. Hehe... sometimes, we just have to be fair aight?! Hehe... So this is the card i got for my dad. I like it... It's such a lovely and eye-catching card... hehe...

Ta-daaa... =D Is it nice? Striking? Lol...

The content... Hehe... Sorry peeps can't click for a larger image~

I think not many daughters call their dad old man on their birthday, huh... Well... It's good to change once in a while XD... Ja ne!

2006-08-25T13:25:00.000+08:00

Her Story ...
Working during holidays are very common among youngsters nowadays. Well, its obvious isn't it?! Money is oh-so important. Well, that includes me. Last year, when i finally finished my form five, i worked for approximately 3 months. I had 5 months of holidays then. Hehe... was kinda lazy after the first 3 months 'cos thought of enjoying life - sit back and relax... But, anyhow, relaxing here means getting myself bored to death and pamper myself too much that i've gotten so lazy. Well, that's not what i want to post here today... here's her story~ enjoy...

She used to be a 'considered as a smart' student in school. However, no matter how good you are in school, you still can't run away from every youths dilemma. She finally got to complete her form five here last year and after that, just like every other teenagers, she is encouraged by her parents to get a part-time job. Although she herself dislike working in a mall, she had to do so... Otherwise, she'll just laze around at home and spend all her savings on i-have-no-idea what. Finally, her friend asked her to go work with him. A store which is filled with good peoples. She can't deny; people she met there is very good indeed. As blurred as she can be... she actually met her boyfriend there. Lol... Think back, things can be real silly. She can be very silly. Her motto used to be no pain no gain .She gives her best shot in almost everything she does. However, once she is bored, nothing can motivate her anymore. That explains why she only worked for a not-very-long period at that particular store.
On the second day of working as a sales assistant, she met 2 guys. I shall name them A and B alright. Lol - me lazy to think of names lah... A was very helpful. At first, she thought that he was a full-timer there. But in the end, she found out that he is not. He is actually an art student. The only person who actually encouraged her to go for her interest while she was in a dilemma in education fairs... Lol... It's not that other people don't support her but, she has her own piece of mind. At times, she can be real realistic and matured. But other than that, she's just an ordinary girl you see walking on the street everyday. She treated A like her brother. Well, she's the eldest in the family and have always wanted a brother. It's no possible she knows. It's just an impossible wish...It will be a wish now and always~ Childish isn't it? On the other hand, B was new. It was only her second day and his too when they know each other... Not officially know. Things get better when three of them went for lunch together. Bonds were more visible then. They were all friends.
She is a girl... who have very low confidence at times but never fails to laugh at the lamest joke ever. That was then... When depression actually is not very visible in her life. All along, she knew that she only can make friends. And loved that. She knows where she stands and she has always tried her best never to cross any line. Parents is the most important factors here. She comehow DO NOT hide/ tell lies to her parents. Maybe it's trained. A result of long-term obligation towards her parents. The way her mother taught her to be. She is strictly not allowed to get herself involved in any relationship .However, sometimes, it's hard. People does not seem to understand this. The feeling of betrayal is always there if she disobeys her mom.
Working days were fun. The store is never patronless... She enjoyed climbing up and down... And once, almost fell... Lol... Memories. Problems arise after some time. As a girl, she has senses. She noticed that A were being such a helpful friend that sometimes, he's just too good. He'll help her everytime she tries to reach for something...Help her always... She felt slight uncomfortable. However, friends they are. She went out with him to education fair. Just a day after his sad experience. She thought he might cheer up if they spend a day out. However, things is not always as she expects them to be. She can feel that he is being just too good. He's a good guy she have to admit. But not the type for her. A is already categorize in the no more that friend category from the very first day she met him. She told her friends about her senses but no one believed her.
On the other hand...B was again another friend of hers. They talked alot. Went for movie together, and went shopping too. However, till now, she can't figure out why she went out with a mere stranger mere friend - only both of them. Maybe he looks honest enough to be trusted? Lol... She told B about A and is very glad that he is the only one person who actually noticed and agree with her senses. Her friends... were busy saying that she and B have something in between. Then, was not true of course. Since then, B and her talked about loads of things.
One night, A told her about his feelings towards her. She was kinda frightened. Don't know what to do. He was at her house! Nearby that is... Hehe... He friends don't believe her... So, she smsed B. Before that, there were rumours in the whole store among everyone working tehre that she has something with B. It was nothing more than rumours then. B replied very slowly. She was then already halp asleep. Made the decision to reject A even before he can say anything. Friends. That's all that was in her mind then. SHe have always reject people all her life. It nothing if she do it once more. So, she did it. Since then, she avoids A. Soon, A have to continue with his studies and did not work there anymore. But, they are still friends. Althought the route wasn't smooth... Once friendship is bonded, it will never break.
She always go for lunch with A when they are working. He even come have lunch with her when he found out that she was alone during her lunch time. Things begins to differ here. As blur as she can be, she actually does not realise anything! As usual...there's plenty of rumours between both of them but yet, she's still in the know-nothing position. Until one day, he asked her through net. Whether she has a boyfriend...and stuff like that. Then, only she began to pay more attention. Indeed, she has to agree with her friends, B does have feleings for her. Unconsciously taht it. She too has good feelings towards him. He took the courage to confess to her on February 14th. That's how it began ~ She was actually brave enough to disobey her parents' rule for her and accepted him. Well, life's not easy then... but its all worth it ...

Hmmm... story not ended yet... but i don't know how to continue already... Till then... Ja mata =D

2006-08-21T11:12:00.000+08:00

In the highest stage of depression...
...yet i have a party to attend tonight.
I feel so useless. Basically, i am not allowed to sms too much, talk on the phone too long, play games too much, return home after 12am, go out too often, go out at night... It seems that i can't do anything except study too much. Why can't someone tell me that i shouldn't study too much? I think i will go crazy if i continue being like this. Everything i do MUST come with a reason. When i go out... even if it's with my friends, friends whom i have known for 6 years, i have ask for permissions and answer questions. Maybe it's me. I'm so sick of myself. Today, thought it will be better, but everything is just the same. everyday, everytime is the same. Nothing will change but me. I've changed to the worst. Happy? Tell me the meaning. It's dissapearing from my dictionary. Sadness is creeping all over me. Last night, thought want to drive to the nearest mamak to get a drink. But the answer is CANNOT. She don't even need a minute. It's just so spontanious. Fine then, i won't eat. I feel so stupid. Tears seem to be falling for no reason. Nothing seems to be right to me now. This morning, thought can spend a morning out with mom... it's just crappy. All i want is drive us out to have a breakfast. Then, she said she want to go to Mydin...I said ok i'll drive. All i want is to drive! She called her friends and her friend will drive. Fine..Then we'll just go for breakfast..alone...only both of us. Even THAT can't be done. She says go down to the market to eat. Then go shop later on with her friends. Won't she feel bored? I end up staying at home. Yesterday she said she want to go to the new Mydin but end up? SHe said she will be busy till 3...Before that, she went to the market and have her usual "gathering" with her friends which she sees everyday. What i dislike most is once she goes down, it will last for at least an hour or two before she returns home. That's fine. Then she said at night can go... Cut the crap. Just forget about going. Today, she says if i want to drive there, i can go tomorrow...AGAIN?! Why the heck that i need to go to the same place again?! Eventhough i wanted to go...But just forget about it. I have a week of holidays. True...i have loads of time? Not true. I admire those people who can actually share talks with their parents...especially mom about their relationship. However, i can't. Things just won't work out. It's either me being too sensitive or too hard-headed. Well, she's the same too. For eternal. This will last for eternal. She's too tied up to her own piece of mind. I shouldn't get myself involved in any relationship now. Can't she understand that i am a normal person?! I am not those who LOVES studying. It's damn important i know. Apart from that, can't i experience something else? Yeah right. She say it's up to me. She can't stop me if i want to. Since i want, made my decision, she's making things hard for me. I feel like i'm living in the dark or something. Hideous life. Just recently, i had a phone conversation with him...quite long..my brother knew. I asked him not to tell her. She doesn't like it. The result? He told and she knew. So? What's the big deal right? But for me, the way she talked to me then, changed. It's different. It's obvious that she's against it. The more i face this, the more i don't want to get my obligation done - study. I hate it. I am not mad or anything but frustrated. Annoyed. Irritated. Sometimes, she's really good. That makes me feel sorry. What am i to do? Loads of things happened and nothing seems to be right to me. I did numerous things but nothing seems to be right either. ~ Bye~

2006-08-10T22:32:00.000+08:00

Movie Maniac
I've evolved from a movie no-no to a movie maniac! Crazy ain't i. One moment i'm complaining that i lack of cash and the next moment? Asking people to go watch movie with me. Blame who? Lol... For now, can i blame you, Kelvn? He's going to be sooo "happy" when he reads this. Hehe... Sound me then, k? Why when i'm free there's so few new interesting movies and now that i'm busy like hell... (sorry if i'm being rude) there's so many movies? Actually i'm not very busy. I'm just keeping myself busy. No to add onto the miserability of my life but to avoid thinking unecessary stuff. Eherm...some stuff. Which need not much thinking but i just can't decide. I even list down the movies that i want to watch...Omg...$$! i need $$!!! I sound desperate ain't i?! Lol...
- Click
- Dragon Tiger Gate
- Dorm
- Lady in the water
- Garfield 2
- Monster house (not realeased yet)
Basically, i can just watch anything that have been released -.-"
call me a big spender...
Recently, been stressing very much on my studies. Especially Chemistry and Maths. Impressive aren't we? One whole class actually flung our chemistry paper. The resut? Have to sacrifice my oh-so-lovely Friday to stay back and clean the lab after school. T_T *sob sob* Who ask me to be so reckless at the beginning. Sigh. Maths? Sucks. I've never been good in calculations. And to add to the hardness, it's in ENGLISH! The medium have always been BM since standard 1! I'm glad that they switched it back to english now. Good for you kids. ^^ ( some how, i feel old saying this) =S
Finally, i'm allowed to re-learn hip hop! =) So happy. Well,i'm kinda in a hurry now. So, gonna post more about my life updates some other times~
My blog tend to be cold nowadays. The reason? I'm once again in depression and ... don't know how to describe myself... Bye

2006-08-04T15:37:00.000+08:00

Muh Bay-Bee
My 'lil darling. Love her so much. In fact i'm kinda obssesed with bunnies ^^

My Bunny ... Isn't she cute? =D

Naughty little Bunny burnt her whiskers... Ouch! ><"

It's so so so slow...

2006-08-03T22:39:00.000+08:00

Surprised
Yesterday, i gave up being a librarian. Why i joined in the first place and let go even before the elction? This is a question i have answered a dozen times. It came to my mind that studies comes first no matter what. I feel that it's not necessary to be too active in form 6. Seriously i AM struggling now itself. Don't wish my life to be more miserable. So, the major reason is i'm afraid that i can't cope. I'm not wonder woman you see. There are some who is able to cope with sooo many things. I salute them. They have excellent time management and very diciplined. Too bad, i am not a person. Nowadays i am quite unorganized. Not in a good condition. I think i just failed my chemistry test two days ago. What elso could be worst than failing my exams? Sigh. What can i say.
However, i was really surprised when Jonathan came asking me why i quit. Pek Tong was wondering why i did not turn up for the exam... Naidu asked...and a few other people too. Ridz was like scolding me (in a good way) and Suriel was pretty much surprised too. Lol. I thought my existence doesn't matter. But it seems that when i am there, i am there. ^^
Perhaps at the beginning i want to taste what it is like to be a librarian in BB. But some how i doesn't suits me. Lol...History is repeating itself. Again. However, i'm kinda relieved after i let it go. My parents seems to be noticing that i spend too much time in school already. Lessen your activities and concentrate more on your studies. That's what's playing on their mind i guess. Once in a while, i think i should obey them more. ^^
However, i'm going to miss the whole thing although it wasn't long. Nice to meet you guys =) I won't be entering the library anymore. Unless i need to. See ya =)
Good Luck to all of you. May you pass with flying colours =)

2006-08-02T21:50:00.000+08:00

Smile! =)
Finally, Kelvn returned from Johor and i can get my pictures =) Here! enjoy yeah ...

Peace! My brother and sister ^^ Yup..went there with them ^^

Short ziraffe makes me feel tall... =D

Muackssss~

The earth is senget! Thanks to my 'splendid' skill ^^

My brother was so funny on that night...like this lantern alot ^^

Hahaha...so 'sot' lar him... he does look funny right?

We went to the forest of lantern ^^

What's with him lar? Should be happy that i took picture with him!

Best description? - The 3 monkeys~ matches the background too XD

The power of fishball !!!

The tail of the plates-teacups-spoons dragon ^^

The body... Me and my clay rose ^^

The kepala ~ finally... it was sooo long!

I guess that's all for now..i took soo soo soo many pictures... ang once again blogspot is slowing down...Bye ~ =)

2006-07-29T18:27:00.000+08:00

I had tons of fun!
After the 'thrilling' drive home, finally i'm able to go to where i've been longing to go since a month ago. The Asia Lantern Festival. Everything was lit up there and the view was so carnival-ish it's been ages since i attended such event. Anyway, i ended up being there with my sister and brother too ^^ It was fun alright. Although i don't really like to go out with both of them together, but this time i didn't regret. All of us was so stress-free. =) The hyperactive brother of mine was so funny XD. He's literally a brat but not on last night. The semangat me, start takin pictures from the moment we enter that place till we leave. Even took picture infront of the 'tandas awam'. ><" It's been more than a decade since i truly enjoy like last night. We reached at 8 ++ pm and went home at 11.30 pm. =D Eventually, we went round and round the whole place. Even saw sam eugene thrice! Then, i realise that i was broke due to my reckless desire to buy pigs. I'm still broke. T_T And still owe people money. How sad. Anyway, it's all worth it that i had so much fun yesterday. =D Thanks Kelvn for everything. =) Lets go to the National Zoo during my holiday eh?! Hehehe...We shall see then. =) Pictures will be up later 'cos he's not here. Have to wait till he return only can get my hands on the pictures...Sigh i'm so eager to develope them and show 'em to my parents. Show them what they've missed. Hehe. All of us really had a splendid night. ^^ Love ya =)

2006-07-29T18:16:00.000+08:00

It was horrendous!
Yesterday was overall a very fun day. =D However, nothing is perfect, eh?! I spent my morning with puppies and my noon waiting for tt. =S I was a 'lil pissed off but everything was fine soon. My attempt trying not to talk to him in the car failed miserably. ><" We then went to sam's place. Very early... reached there at 3 ++ pm. After a shivering experience in her condo's pool, i had to go. By 6 pm. Supposedly i'm to leave my house at 6.30 pm and head straight to bukit jalil. A lot of interruptions occured in between. One of 'em was the horrendous journey home. I literally scratch the car's bumper against the wall in the parking lot. Thank god it's still in one piece. ><><><" Here came what i hate most...slope...not a small one. quite steep. Sigh. Can't go up a slope with the second gear. I've learnt my lesson. The car jerked like hell! I was at the side of the highway. Sigh. Maybe i should stick a "danger" behind my car. T_T the journey home was so scary~ T_T Only from ss2 to sunway. I've experienced more than enough. Sorry tt for the terrible ride. ><"

2006-07-28T11:51:00.000+08:00

People say
I have no idea why but what people say recently, i can't stop myself from recalling them. Thus, to get rid of 'em from my mind, i think i should type 'em all out. They just can't stop haunting me. These things tend to creep all over me. If anything not-so-nice happen, i can't say that no one warned me. Sigh what is this la?!

Dad : Why you want to swim in a condo pool? It's not safe. -.-"
Mom : Do bring the car home before it gets dark.
Brother : Can i play your computer?
Sister : I'm not gonna do well in my exam.
Kelvin : I'm lost. / Don't misunderstand me.
Tik Tsin : Taman sea or Sri Aman ??
Samantha : Don't ask.
Eva : asks sam, "who is that la?!"
Aw Yong : erm... ?! P & C
Victor : i finally got my streamyx...tomorrow got exam!
Yun wai : Hey~
Aunty Debra : You gain weight. -.-"
Aunty Kam : Still ok what. Not very fat
Siukeong : Queen of housefly XD
Kp : Next!
Chew KH : What did he recently talk to me ar..can't remember this one.
Pang Shen : Oi...if you say you're busy again, i'll beat you!
Yu Cheng : How's mei, paul and john lately? - no idea
PT : Oh yea, don't tell people about this. It's not confirmed yet. -.-" -What do you think i am?
John : Hi. What are you doing?
Waikit : change dp.
Ko : Who is kelvin ar?
Aunt : You must learn how to drive.
Cookie and Youko : Kiit kiit kiit kiit kiit ... Lol . means i want food!
Bunny : Urgh. *Push open my room door and lies on my bed*

Randomly posted. These phrases are always playing in my mind. *faints*
Don get me wrong. I just need to get some of 'em out that's all.
Of course you still can talk to me lar... i don't mind.
Today's mood not so good ~ That's all. Will heal very soon.

2006-07-28T11:37:00.000+08:00

Koinu
"I shall go see them. Those cute little creatures". Some how, they frightened me. The moment i reached their 'playground' i see 5 cuddly, white creatures jogging towards me wagging their cute little tails.In my neighbourhood, there's loads of street animals...especially cats and dogs. I've seen squirrel before too ^^. My mom always feed those innocent little creatures along with my sis every single day. They've never missed their daily breakfast. A very rich one that is. Quite la. ><" 19 puppies. Now, reduced to 13. The other 6 was lucky to be adopted. Most probably because they stand out of the others which look very 'common'. They are all so active! allthe while i was there, they never fail to keep themselves entertained. However, fleece is always a problem for animals. Especially when they are 'street' ones. All of 'em are so so so cute that i can't stop playing with 'em. Thus, i spent more than an hour there. I can't deny that they are dirty. But, what do you expect. I wonder if SPCA will take them taken care of under their shelter. Animals can't speak for themselves, therefore we have to speak for them. They need to be protected! i'll try to get some of their pictures ^^ You really can't resist them. Although they are just crosses.

2006-07-26T16:03:00.000+08:00

Boku wa baka desu ne
Sigh** I feel dumb. Kino kara, i feel like a baka. Kanashii desu yo boku wa. Baka o narimashita. Kanashii *sob sob*. Today, during bio class, we had this how-to-handle microscope lesson. Teacher taught us step by step patiently. Unfortunately, due to my lame carelessness, i cracked my specimen slide. T_T How careless can i be?! Apart from that, i was so sleepy during chemistry that my brain won't function properly. In other words, i'm totally spaced out. After 3 periods of bio, 2 chem, finally, it's maths. Enter class late. Missed some important 'moments'. We are in chapter 3 now. Sequences and series. I am totally blur! I only know that it's janjang in english. That's all. Formula, all gone. Sigh. Tried to do some questions. Out of 13, i only did 4. Saddening ain' i. I couldn't concentrate at all. My eyes can't stop looking at the clock wondering how much more i have to bare with before i can get home. I need a break. Yeah tt was right. I haven't started anything and i am in terrible need of a break already. What is this?! I was so motivated earlier on the week. Sigh. It's decided. Friday, absent. Saturday...it's weekend! I'm not going. Suspend me if i'm constantly skipping school. I have finally decided to improve my driving skills. Since i can't do anything good in school, i might just do something delighting after school. However, i was worse than yesterday. I actually bang something. Don't know how to picture it here... Sigh...Weekends...come sooner. Tatsukete kudasai...not asking for anyone but myself. Tsukaremashita. When will this over? Why am i so unsettled? Confused and messy. Yeah what people say is best not to be bothered but, it keeps on popping up in my mind. Honto ni, tsukaremashita.

2006-07-25T18:52:00.000+08:00

My day was fairly nice till recess.
These two days, i have finally made up my mind to try my best in everything i am suppose to do currently in form 6. However, life is never smooth eh? Unexpected bad news came up.During recess that is. I shall keep myself in my 'up' mood and carry on with whatever i have planned to do. Be optimistic i shall be. I have never been more motivated. And i shall keep the spirit up. Thanks people for your advice. I am glad that i am allowed to share my problems with you. Your advices will be taken into account. e***, i'm so sorry to dissapoint you. Please don't feel hard to decide. i respect the choice you make no matter what your decision is. I made a terrible mistake i should have not make. And i have nothing to say about myself. I only hope that you trust me and don't misunderstand me. That goes to the rest or you. However still, i did not do whatever you guys thought i did. It's up to you how you judge me but i am not that kind of person. Please bare in mind.
Boku no tomodachi wa, arigato.

2006-07-25T18:08:00.000+08:00

Wth?! Very dissapointing.
If you don't trust me, i shall let it go. I did not ask for it. Upon the chance given to me, i stayed. Honestly, i DID NOT spread the news. I don't deny that i told two or three person, but i DID NOT tell everyone. I'm not desperate for it. Isn't it unfair for judging me before listening to my explanation? With or without the particular 'thing' doesn't really matter to me. I only can say that i'm not some one who likes to spread news, especially when it's about myself whether gain fame or whatsoever. I'm not even proud of it. I just took it as an opportunity for me to work and gain more experience and of course, for the sake of that 10%. Enter local U or not, currently, i am not thinking about it at all. I just want to do all my current responsibilities with everything i have. I'll always give my best shot. When i want to do something, i'll make sure it turns out to be the best i can do. I cannot work with a person/party who have no faith in me. Believe it or not, i did not! DID NOT tell everyone. 'Spreading unecessary news' is not in my vocabulary. i don't give a damn.
Gossip in a no-no in my life. I have no idea how those "people" found out about it. I don't even talk to them in class. Why would i bring trouble to myself. Moreover, do i look like a boastful person to you? You need not to tell me what is right or what is wrong; what i'm supposed to do, what i'm not; what i can do, what i can't because i can perfectly differentiate 'em. i will always bare in mind that i am not official yet in anything. I haven't even pass my first stage! Why would i be so proud? I'm a dumbass if i did what you assumed i did now. The only thing i prepared myself for after i got the news is i will try my best and try not to let you guys down. When i was about to prove that you did not make the wrong choice, things like this happen. Hence, if you want to change your mind, go ahead. It's literally out of my control.
What's the worst thing that can happen?! I'll just carry on with my previous decision. Yes, you people are much much more better than me. Maybe i don't deserve anything. I have no one to blame but myself. Seriously, i felt very bad about that matter and it became worse when those words were said to me. Casually said that it. If you want to say anything, come and settle everything frankly. You need not indirectly hinting me that i have a big mouth. If you can't trust me, please feel free to change your mind.i underdtand your situation. There's nothing i can do. I rather stay out of it than having the whole party misunderstand me. It's no point working there if i'm not feeling happy. Being stiff is alright but everything has a limit. I am certainly never going to admit what i did not do wrong. Believe me or not, it's your choice. I am not forcing you in anyway and there's nothing i can do. I am sorry to dissapoint you. I'm not begging for a chance. Just act as you like.
Perhaps i trusted the wrong people that is. However i would like to tell you that i understand perfectly what is to be told and what is not. I am not who you think i am. It's already happen. You decide what to do next. I shall keep my mouth shut. I know i have no right to say anything about it now. My wish now is only to defend myself and you got me wrong entirely. If you think that i'm such a boastful person and is accepting any offer for the sake of fame, I rather be a normal student. I cannot do anything to stop what other people want to say but i surely can speak for myself. Dissapointment is all i can feel. Not in anyone but myself. As i said, there's no one i can blame but myself. I might not be right entirely, but what did i did wrong? Dissapointment, furiousity and guilt came on the same time. I was speechless too.

2006-07-23T21:45:00.000+08:00

Pictures Up!
BB o-nite shots. These are all those that i managed to get. Enjoy~

Eastin Hotel Lobby (L-R) Eva, Cassie, Samantha, Me, E-Von

Prakash, Me, Navindra

Amin, Priscilla, Me (so weird), Samantha (classy =D)

Samantha, Eva ( she has the voice of an angle =), Me

Cassie, Hussein ( What's with his expression?), Me

Me and my senior... Aw Yong (he's really really like Yun wai)

The Grand Finale - Crossover XD Fun! (L-R) ; Casual me, Senior ( Forgot her name ><"), Kousalia, Sexy Amin, E-Von, Mak Cik Sam, Uma, Gabriel XD, Hussein, TT

Me, TT, MiuKee, Samantha

Aren't they lovely? =) (MiuKee and Samantha)

My crown... hahaha XD

That's all people... i have no patient to upload more 'cos it's so slow -.-"

2006-07-23T01:10:00.000+08:00

It was unexpected
Expect the unexpected i always say but today, it was really unexpected. The workshop i attended was unexpectedly BORING! Maybe it's because it has nothing to do with me as i am not taking up any course related to mass comm or broadcasting. I'm just a normal science student. I'm not THAT interested in science also. Maybe that's why i don't excel in it. Went there with tt. And thanks dad for letting him drive. *bows* The cybertorium at The Star tower were freezing cold. Everyone had goosebums... Especially Priscilla. Lol... I was shivering alright. Me and tt kinda rushed there as there were some business to be taken care of before we headed there. And the traffic were terrrible. Rain worsen the condition. We were using i-forget-what's-the-name Highway and he was only able to use he second gear! Imagine how sloe we wear going. Moreover, i only ate a pao, tt, empty stomach... Saddening aren't we. After that, the workshop lasted for about 2.5 hours. Till then, which is already 5 ++ pm...we had our refreshments. Very light ones. =S
After that, FINALLY...PIZZA!!! All 8 of us, including miukee and my senior headed off to PJ State Pizza Hut. Juat went there last week =S Surieloasan amazingly ate 5 slices of Veggie Lover! Boy, he is a veggie lover.. And, to enhance it, he added so much tabasco sauce! Omg...i hate tabasco sauce. Me myself can't believe it. They actually empty the half-filled tabasco sauce by the time we leave the restaurant. Crazy... Miukee ate pizza+tabasco sauce + loads of cheese powder... So does tt... =S
It's a unforgetable meal i must say. I had the worst gralic bread ever! I almost threw up. After i ate that bit of garlic bread+ tabasco sauce+ salt+ ketchup+ cheese powder+ pepper. It's the most disgusting food i have every eaten. Yucks! And the amount of tabasco sauce and sauce ain't little. It was so hard to swallow.
Something must've gone wrong in their mind. Later on, they actually tasted the cola+ tabasco sauce (again)+ chicken soup (i added XD)+ salt (krystle loves 'em) + cheese powder (miukee likes 'em)+ chilli sauce+ pepper drink. And Sam...said...suprisingly...it tastes not bad. NOT BAD!!! Omg... i dare not even smell it..seriously...i WILL throw up.
However, we was supposed to head over to Mid Valley after that. Unfortunately, plan was cancelled. I wasn't allowed to go, and tt was with me, so he can't go (i feel so bad). SO... sorry everyone. ^^" Headed home soon after that. Hopefully, no one headed straight to the toilet after that. hehe~

2006-07-22T22:22:00.000+08:00

Weird Bunny i have
I have a Bunny. Very fond of it. But nowadays, i'm kinda busy and thus, did not spend much time with her. I wonder if she's depressed or what...She is weird! She's been behaving out of the blues lately. Sob Sob. So sad.

My Bunny...
- dislikes carrot (serious)
- eats matches ( i wonder why...she needs fibres? carbon?)
- eats rubber band (Sigh...why?)
- chew off and eats paper made boxes (once she ate too much, that she actually recycled 'em..her poops all are biji-biji boxes T_T)
- Occasionally bite my pigs =S (freaks them out)
- Keep on wanting to enter my room (strictly not allowed..not by me of course)
- Stays behind the door for the whole day...(i wonder if she will feel bored)
- Eats her own poops and today...ear wax (it's disgusting i know...i also can't figure out why)

People must be wondering if i feed my Bunny. Honestly, i do. And no kidding. Her food ain't cheap. You see...

- A small bottle of corn nugget (treat) = Rm7.20
- A bottle of alfafa = Rm10.50 (more or less...i hardly remember)
- Daily food , rabbit pellets = Rm2/kg
- Timothy Hay = Rm7 for a quite big pack (bought during sale)
- Red apples = Rm0.50 one, one apple a day keeps the doctor away XD
- Carrots (for pigs)
- Sawi...what's sawi called in english? if you know, please drop a comment. thanks ^^
- erm..ubi kayu call what in english? do drop a comment if you know.thanks alot!
- Other variety of rabbit food like briter bunny(Rm7.50.kg),Vita vittles (Rm10.50/kg) -occasionally

But, why is she eating all those junks?! Sigh~

2006-07-22T21:55:00.000+08:00

Silly Clumsy Me
I broke a mirror! It happened yesterday while i was getting ready for O-nite. Lol..I'm not being superstitous. It's just that i have never broke a mirror before. I've been real clumsy and silly lately. I don't know why... Here's what i did...

- Accidently spilled candle wax on Yi Vern's arm *i'm so so so sorry =(*
- Broke a mirror...now i have no mirror. Even worse, it's my mom's
- Ushered on stage to receive my 'crown' with one bare foot and one with socks
- Always say the wrong things at bad times and make people get the wrong meaning
- Say stupid things - you won't want to know what are they ><"

What else...i can't recall. Surely, i don't wish to have a longer list. Only these are already more than enough.
Random post

2006-07-22T21:13:00.000+08:00

Bye bye O-nite
It's time to get serious people! O-Nite is over! Former sixth form board of directors and all of those who are involved, good job! =D We had a wonderful night. The performances was quite satisfying. Except for some unevitable technical problems ><" Well, like Fung How said, what's a show without technical problems?! XD Had fun last night. Our principal rox! She's the best principal ever! Open enough, considerate enough...You will never find anyone better than her. =D Yesterday, although it's written 6.30pm SHARP on the ticket, the whole thing started at 7 something. I was starving as i spent the whole afternoon getting myself ready. I sux at make ups so...faham-faham la. Then, the speeches was amzingly short...thankfully; except for the one and only speech conducted in malay la...it's dragging long but shorter than usual. The food was satisfying~ Well, everyone was hungry so eventually, everything tasted nice. hehe. Especially me. I didn't get to taste the dessert though.T_T Anyway, the main purpose is not to judge the chef's cooking. Mariammah sure can dance. Splendid! You should've seen how she danced...hehe, the band performance wasn't that smooth, but the did practiced very hard and...good job guys! Didn't know miukee can sing ><" Mengwai was so gothic! Eva's singing was heavenly. She's simply perfecto *peace* Me and Sam even made tt gave her a rose on his knees~ Lol...Fun. She's a wonderful singer! Good job for u eva! I'm your fan already. hehe...The retro fashion show...Lol..they all have GREAT wigs~ Haha...where did you guys get that la?! The former board of directors too all lighted up the new boards candles. Hence, officially, i am to be the secretary and shall start doing my job...Then, for the most waited event of the night... Ta-da... the list of winners are...

Prom King - Abbas *bling bling*
Prom Queen - Thanuja *the all white lady*
Freshie King - Tik Tsin *congrats!* ~ cheers
Freshie Queen - Lol...the one ushered up the stage with tt's top and baggy pants and one foot socked, one bare foot ~ Fei. *sweats hard*
Best dressed female - Sweet Yee *kesian she lost her personal belongings*
Best dressed male - Satesh who looks distinguished XD
Most eligible bachelor - I forgot who lar...erm erm *thinks hard*
Most eligible bachelorette - Soh Sin Yee XD

However, while everyone was dancing to the rythm (cassie, you are sexy; great dancer), something not-so-nice happened...someone, being reckless...stole a seniors handbag. How evil. Unfortunately, her belongings gone missing. Sigh...The whole thing was interupted. Then soon after that, the night ended. All the ladies was indeed demure; as my muet teacher says...girls dress to kill. Hehe...Guys were all smart...with their blazers and tie and their very own unique style...me? reached home at 1.30am i think...with all my luggage...i ended up having 4 tea cups..add one more, and my whole family can have tea together. Love the flowers...and very sorry to my senior. Tt didn't steal your date. You were busy so ... It's just like that. Well, hope that everyone enjoyed themselves and now, it's the time to get all the brain cells working. Ja.
p/s. Girba...your cross over was a success. Congrats =)
Pictures will be uploaded soon. Hopefully.

2006-07-22T20:54:00.000+08:00

Final decision is made
I have decided. Finally. Actually before this i made up mind mind to quit being a librarian but when i told e-von, the current president, i have to reconsider everything all over again. However, now, i have finally decided. I'm going to continue. You see, it's not everyday that people get something. Especially when that particular person is new in something. I don't know that what she saw in me, but i have decided to give it a shot. I shall take the risk. Better time management is all i need to take into account. I have not been anything before, so, hopefully i can cope with it. Ganbarimasu fei! Yeah, i have to be prepared for loads of things and equip myself with the right armour. Currently, although my life in form 6 has just enter the third month, i found that my knowledge in almost all the subjects are in bits and pieces. Shattered. My application skill is terrible. It's the worst of the worst. Imagine that! Sometimes, i really doubt that i actually got a string of As for my former major exam. I have no intention of taking up any tuition classes this year, but it's hard to say. Things evolve gradually and so do i. I am not a hardworking person you see. Therefore, i shall work myself to death coping everything i am supposed to. But, at least, i need not ive up to other people's expectations. Only mine. Tension, stress and pressure are always there. They neevr stop haunting me no matter where am i and when is it. All i have to do is deal with them and save myself a bit. Thanks my friends for your support. But, i'll be real busy and i hope that you guys understand. Anyhow, don't miss me when you guys are going out for any treat...i'll try to make it if i can. =) What's the point living without friends? Socialise is very important here you see...Lol. Life's never smooth. (trying to comfort myself...) With my post as a secretary in the form 6 society, and editorial board, and hopefully i'll be ok with this, and never to be forgotten, my stpm...Omg...*i see stars going about above my head* ganbate Ho Voon Fei! Good luck to me. Hence, it's decided...suriel! i need my log book back! ><" Pek Tong's gonna fail me without that! *runs after suriel XD* Bye people!

2006-07-20T19:10:00.000+08:00

Amano Ginji?!
Lol...my senior is pretty good with arts and this is one of his art piece. =)
It's Amano Ginji from The GetBackers.

The Amano Ginji that reflects his mood (Before i land my hand on it ><")

I kinda like this piece very much although it looks sad. Maybe it's because currently, i'm like something like that also. Lol...I was supposed to finish my maths piling up homework. Instead, i've decided to colour the drawing. ><" Sadly, i only can colour...but can't draw. It's been a long time since i last coloured something...thus, this is the best i can do for now. I have no idea how Amano Ginji looks like so i randomly coloured this art piece of his.

I name it Modified Amano Ginji. (After i land my hand on it XP)

I hope he don't mind me playing around with his art piece. Gomenasai if he minds.

2006-07-20T15:46:00.000+08:00

Boys schools' boys vs co-ed schools' boys
One thing that i noticed not long ago after i joined the boys' school is...Boys in single gender school(s) are different.
Boys...Generally they are the same. However, the environment which they are from may be one of the reason that every one of 'em are slightly different.
Sometimes, they tend to do foolish things just because of their ego. Guys are egoistic creatures. That's the norm. They might just do anything to protect their ego or more known as "face". Paiseh is the common word used when they are embarassed or been put in a not-very-nice situation.
According to my MUET teacher's experience in BBBS, boys actually tend to jump from the highest floor of a building in the school just because someone challenged him to do so. Isn't that silly?
In addition to that, TT said...one of the top ten questions you shouldn't ask guys... is... " You dare?" When you doubt them, they'll show you that it's not necessary. Once you blurt out this particular question, they'll immediately change their mind although at first they didn't think of doing it. They just have to show you that it's not right to doubt them. Especially their courage and ability. However, this doesn't apply to all of 'em...hopefully. XD
Boys in co-ed schools always think before they speak or act. This doesn't happen when you're in a all boys' school. I was kinda shocked when i saw teenage boys running around the canteen chasing each other during recess time. They were acting like a bunch of brats! Are they not matured enough?
Foul language like F**k, son of a b***h, bastard and yada yada are very commonly used among guys in boys' school. Have you seen such scenario where 2 guys hug each other over and over again calling each other bitch? No i have not. Seriously. That was my first time. It's somehow so exaggerating. =S It's as if they haven't met for a few decades... And i was like ... oh "what a 'wonderful' moment." *sweats hard* This is how they greet each other... After that, the student was no where to be seen for the rest of the schooling hours. Guys certainly don't address each other as bitch in my former school.
Boys in co-ed school tend to keep their cool all the time. Their appearance are very important you see. Especially when they are in front of female students. However, this doesn't apply to many of them in a single gender school. They just be who they are. Talk whatever that's in their mind whithout thinking twice; act on their wish.
PJK. Boys in boys' school can miss any other subjects but PJK. They must have PJK. They simply just love it. Or so according to my MUET teacher once again. -.-" PJK or not seems to make not much different in my former school. As me myself dislike PJK. XD
I'll try to come up with the top ten questions you shouldn't ask a guy. Till then, ja XD
No offense guys~

2006-07-20T09:57:00.000+08:00

Ashita wa O-nite desu.
BB O-Nite is tomorrow. Time really pass by very fast. Especially when you're busy. As you grow, the days pass by more rapidly. During maths, time's speeding! During bio, ehich is always the sleepy boring ol' subject, time usualy goes at a very slow pace. However, lately, i noticed that although it's bio, it's still fast. When it's chemistry practical, it's always lack of time. And from the very first day itself, we juniors are told that O-Nite is on 21st of July. At that moment, we'll say...That's 2 months ahead! We shall take our own sweet time. Now, it's tomorrow... Less than 36 hours ahead us. (randomly guessed time. sorry if it's wrong) Questions like "what time you'll be there?"; "What are you wearing for tomorrow night?" will be flowing in the air. As expected, i'm to be there earlier. 6.30 pm is the exact time. So what time should i be there?~ My date? Lol...semangat junior date semangat senior. Lol. Yup. my date is my senior. Which is broken and can't be mended back. I have been wondering, why he asked me in the first place?! I will accept of course. Hopefully it won't be a boring night. i am looking forward for a fun-filled night as this is my first prom/O-nite ever. Lets let it be memorable alright?! Good memories and happy moments shall fill my mind =D. Hopefully that is.

2006-07-20T09:48:00.000+08:00

Am i playing truant?
No...obviously i'm not. I'm just occasionally skipping school. Dad never fail to say everytime i skip school... "Not going to school again? Suka-suka hati skip school...yadayadayada~" *shookes his head* *let out a slight sigh* What can i say?! When i set my mind, i've set my mind. Laziness never fail to creep all over me. So, today i am absent alright. Tomorrow i have to get myself to school no matter what. I can't afford to skip school twice a week as i'll be in total lost when i return back to school. Life in form six is never easy. Harder than any schooling life i've had. You have to play hard in everything. Nevertheless, not forgetting to work hard too. It's all about dicipline, dicipline and dicipline. Although today i managed to skip school, i still have mountains of homework waiting for me to complete. There's no due date. So, it's just up to me whether i want to do it or not. Lay around or do homework? For the sake of my studies...i shall push myself. Finish it today! ><" Notes will never come to an end. Thus, continuous revision and reading is very important. For those who are planning to explore form 6, be prepare. Expect the unexpected. It's not as scary as it sounds here though. hehe.~ There's the fun part of it too. You shall discover yourself. Ja.

2006-07-20T09:10:00.000+08:00

Stressed to death
For some reason, i was all stressed out for the whole week. I was so moody till my senior said me... "U, sendiri cari pasal...susahkan sendiri." Haih..Yeah. I agree to that. It's just a simple topical chemistry test and maths test also and chemistry practical...and i'm already stressed out till like this. I dare not how am i gonna deal with final and even worse, the major exam next year. What's wrong with me? When i'm all stressed out, i tend to be weak. I get tired very easily and sooner or later, i'll be ill. Thank god i'm still standing here now. Quite healthily standing that is. On tuesday, i had to stay back for librarian workshop. I managed to step in my house at around 5 pm and at 6 pm...i slept. When i open my eyes, the clock strucks ten. Thought want to do homework, but my head aches. Quite a terrible headache that i can't deal with it. Hence, by 11.30 pm, i was off to bed. That's obviously too much i know. But, i was like unconscious while i sleep. Not as alert as i used to be. Where has my stamina gone to? I tend to be tired all day long and yesterday, i got another headache during recess time. Thanks Eva for her panadol. i felt much better after consuming. =) Now that i already have form 6 society and editorial board, i'm quite sure that i need not work myself to death for that additional 10% of extra curricular point. Therefore, i have finally make up my mind. - to quit librarian. TT said " history is repeating itself" And that's really true. Maybe i'm just not as capable as i thought i can be. Lol... Overestimated myself. ><" I shall work till my very last breath for stpm. Ganbarimasu!!!

2006-07-14T17:07:00.000+08:00

I am really busy or it's just me?
I have been thinking...is it just me or my life is actually being more and more hectic day by day? For instant, this week, i had to stay back all week except for Wednesday alone. (boy, i was glad alright). Then, next week, i again, have to stay put in school till evening or late afternoon. This is my schedule for the week...

Monday - Full dress rehearsal for O-Nite performance
Tuesday - Library practical workshop day
Wednesday - Replacement for library duty (which i skipped this week)
Thursday - Library practical again ~
Friday - Supposed to stay back for licrary duty but it's O-Nite! So i can't make it.

To bemore accurate, i guess Friday i'm not staying back~ Or perhaps will not even get my lazy bum to school. XD
So, tell me...is my life actually normal as a sixth former? Or i'm poking my nose into way too much trouble? I find that somehow, keeping myself as busy as a bee may be better. This way, i can move my concentration to my work instead or any other unecessary stuff. No example for this matter though. Cos' i haven't thought of anything in my life is unecessary yet. YET. Anyway, i find it very interesting to have a SEMANGAT senior like mine, where we can actually write really really long letters. Friends, why is wrong with writing long letters? It's a pleasure ya know...?! The fun of writing letters. I've just lost my pen-pal and my senior's being real helpful in this. =)
Lately, i've been real tired. I take long naps...And when i say long, i mean looong! This year i was supposed to dicipline myself and be strict to my perfidious self. I guess i didn't really did what i set in my mnd. Almost everyday, my nap time is at least 2 hours. And lately, it's extended to 3! What can i say... Sigh...i think i'll stop here. It's friday and...Like Sam Eugene says... Friday Night means? Yam Cha night! Lol..i don't go Yam Cha though. Just stay at hom and ease myself. It's time for a nice, relaxing break!

2006-07-11T20:20:00.000+08:00

Tittle-less
Unfortunately...today is the one and only day i need not stay back at school. How tiring. I have no idea why. Everytime...when i can like go home early (friday) or that's the only day of the week i no need to stay back in school, i feel very semangat! heheh.I was so stressed out lately. Have this self conflict which demands more studying, less playing around. I've been enjoying my 'off-days' lately and without realising it i actually have more off days than it's-time-to-study days. When i think back, i feel darn guilty to myself. It's like i've spent my time unwisely. A plan is what i need but the problem is always that eventhough i have a plan, i'll have difficulties sticking to it. Sigh. Miserable eh?! Moreover, *Sam* i think i have PMS too. >.<" It's the time where i feel all stressed out! @_@ Yeah..i agree that sometimes, i thought too much. and i should relaxxxxxxxxxxx... how can i do that when i can't pass myself?! Meaning - somewhere/something in me is very demanding. i'm always in a dilemma whether to follow my heart or my head. when it comes to logical things, i tend to follow my heart which i should follow what my brain says. On the other hand, when it somes to things that involves feeling, i am totally opposite. Like right now, i am supposed to be doing my homework and i end up blogging here. Last week i made myself said things which i wasn't supposed to express to other people especially him which made he get the wrong idea or maybe different concept. Now i think it's better to keep the "unhappy" things to myself and share the "happy" things with people around me. However, will i explode or go insane one day if i really do that? I'm a person who blurt out whatever's in my mind without thinking twice (on certain things). i feel reckless. And perhaps this is the 'sad' season. My mood isn't very good and it seems like many people is like that. Especially people around me? lol..no offence though. not pinpointing anyone indirectly here. Hopefully, eveything will be better soon.
This is something unrelevant. Just want to make myself remember the word...heheh
"Every lady is going to look demure on that night." >.<"
Desperately need to extend my vocabulary and polish on my pronounciation. tata~

2006-07-09T15:44:00.000+08:00

Before-Prom dilemma
O-night a.k.a prom night is around the corner and there's still so many things im unsure of. The 1001 questions are always there.

- Where exactly is that hotel? I have no idea...Postman! where's my map?
- How do i get myself there? Dad doesn't seem to be happy wanting to fetch me there *sob*
- What am i wearing? There's this black dress which i bought for some function 2 years ago! i wonder if it still fits. Haven't try it out yet though.
- Atm machine, i'm definetely visiting you!
- Hair hair hair! when will it be done ?!
- I'm gonna get there with luggage! hahaha XD
- How on earth am i gonna sell two tickets?!
- If i manage to get there, how i'm gonna get home?!
- Exactly what time it's gonna end?
- I sux in decorating myself especially make ups...
- Shoe shoe shoe! where is it ah?
- Mamamia, formal clothes are always so irritating! Must i slim down to fit in? those materials urgh!
- It's gonna be a busy night! will it?
- Hopefully it will be fun! will it be?
- Is date-less miserable on such nights? Hopefully not!

Anyway, i've decided to get everything done on 21st of July...after school and just before the night! haha...wish me luck!

Can't deny it but girls will always be girls. Some but not all maybe. Or shall i say Most of 'em?
Randomly posted~

2006-07-09T15:20:00.000+08:00

Weekends have just begun and it's gonna be over...
Splendid. I simply love weekends. XD Although i used to dislike it. Cos, before this it was just basically a homework-doing day for saturdays and family day for sundays. Now, it has a whole new definition for my weekends! Hopefully i am able to spend it meaningfully every week. Oh yeah. ><" Yesterday, i spent almost the whole day out. =D I actually woke 2 'lelakis' whowas still sleeping on 9++ am. Omg! it's almost ten and they're still sleeping. How can?! Lead a healthy lifestlye shall we. Therefore, i've decided to wake them both up at 9 or 10 every saturday XD. Hehe...i'm a phobia for driving. Eventually, tt need to walk to my house so that i can drive both of us for breakfast. ><><" Quit talking to myself already. Then later on, we went to Ikano ! a place i want patronise since more than a month ago. Finally. And i've bought my Veronika book too ^^ Yeah..ok..i'm flat broke now. ><" I still need to pay for my o-nite ticket! sad sad. lachrymal fluid flowing! Ahaha...XD We manage to get our butts home by 6 pm and at 8 pm, i'm out again! went bakar ayam that is. However, the guys did all the hard work and we ladies is always ready to dine. Ahaha. John's coco is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cute! Hyperactive but cute! I'm a freak for innocent-looking cute creatures! I actually bath 4 times yesterday as the weather was killing me. Got myself home by 12 *ehem cinderella* just to avoid lectures ><" and the result is i missed my weekly driving lesson with my dad and it is to be postponed which means...i CAN"T drive to school yet. T_T *Hand me a tissue will ya?!* sob sob. HOwever, i had a great day and spending weekends out is always better. the end.

2006-07-07T21:08:00.000+08:00

My Pet List
It's time to dig up some of my very own history...
It all started when all along all i wanted is a doggy...
I started having pets when (if i'm not wrong) when i was in standard 6 which is 8 years ago
I used to have
- 2 tortoises (donated to school fish pond)
- another 2 tortoises after 1 or 2 years (donated to school fish pond also)
- form 3 (2003) we started having 1 hamster (hamham), 3 mice and 1 dwarf hamster(ginger)
- Later that year, i had another white dwarf hamster(snowball) and sold 1 grey mouse.
- So, by the end of the year i have 1 hamster, 2 dwarf hamsters and 2 mice.
- Then, i got myself another dwarf hamster(bubble)...so now i have 3 of them =)
- After that hamham ran away and we've got another 2 hamsters (hamham2 and biscuit)
- Not even a week later, biscuit ran away - missing...(maybe eaten by my neighbour's cat)
- After quite some time, hamham2 gone missing also
- Then we got ANOTHER hamster - hamham3 (all the hamhams belong to my sister)
- Sadly hamham3 died because of unexpected delivery when it was too young =(
- Meanwhile, my dwarf hamsters all died due to old age and sickness. T_T
- Then, 2004 around august, i opposed everyone (especially my dad) and adopted Bunny =)
- After that, i got cookie (guinea pig) and not long later, i had oreo, another guinea pig.
- Sadly, oreo died due to a tragic accident (she fell down form the 3rd floor balcony T_T)
- Then cookie was so lonely and i got another guinea pig named youko
- Then all of them remained till now...And recently, i bought another rabbit - meeko =)
So, almost everyone who visited my house said that i could've open a mini zoo.
Despite all the rodents, we have fishes too. =)
- A huge flower horn which allows people to pat it...=S (died when we got it a larger and more spacious new aquarium)
- 9 small kois which only left about 4 or 5 after we return from a trip to god remembers where and my dad decided to send them all to my aunt's fish pond.
- Then we got another piranha-like flower horn which bit every single thing dipped into the aquarium...
- And now, we have small fishes alot alot of 'em =) - they are my sis's and dad's as i have no interest in fishes.
Why is my house full of all these animals? Everything started just because i wanted a dog.

However, i'm very fond of my Bunnies and pigs (especially Bunny) and tt said i'm obssesed with them and calls me a Bunny Freak =S... And note that all my rodents are female...so i have a school of female rodents =D hehehe... that's my list. Hopefully it won't just end there...kakaka!

2006-07-07T19:17:00.000+08:00

Attention folks!
Who wants to go to Bukit Bintang Boy School's O-Nite? You're invited~
Don't get it wrongly. I'll assure you that it's not an all-boys night yea...hehe. The ticket price for non-bbians now is RM95...There will be loads of performances by the six formers and it will be fun. Come join the fun! All are welcomed. For details...scroll down please. Try to look for the entry entitled Orientation Night. Thank you. To buy tickets, my friends, IM me or SMS me. I'll be very grateful to have you with us on that night. Adios

2006-07-07T18:58:00.000+08:00

My opinion : The senior-junior thing is fun =)
Everytime i reply my senior's letter. Everyone tend to ask me the same question. Curiousity is always there, eh. hehe. This senior of mine is a nice person. So far as i am concerned. We write long and i mean long letters to each others. Me myself used to have pen pals where we actually write 'essays' to each other. =) I have a keen interest in writing letters. I can write about anything! Feel so free to express but of course the other party have to be willing to receive and read the letter. If not, there's no point writing. i'll feel very delighted to receive letter too =) Somehow, i'm looking forward for that particular person to reply. =) The most weird thing is i actually can smile reding letters! hahaha i have no idea why myself but i can get very excited over very small matters. Heheh is it good or bad? i sometimes wonder but always end up without an answer. Just act with your feeling will do i guess. hehehe i can't we are to be happy go lucky all the time. It's just that you smile and laugh joyfully when you're happy and cry when you're sad. it's that simple! Or maybe i'm simple minded. haha...i can't tell. Oh who can tell me?! Hehe. However, connecting through letters might form a bond between the people involved. For example i face difficulties talking face to face to people whom i always write to and even sms! or msn... Shy is it? i don't know. hehe..however, time will tell everything =) be patient and everything will go on fine enough for me to handle...hopefully =)

2006-07-07T18:53:00.000+08:00

Longest record...
Hahaha should i be proud or what. Since i got my streamyx, this week is the longest period where i actually succeeded staying offline and didn't even on my computer for 4 days =D. it's lame but for me...it's hard! Very, really... I've got soooo many things to blog but the weird thing is, my mind goes blank whenever i sit in front of my pc! How saddening right. Ahh...This week, my schooling hours have been extraordinary long. except wednedsay as i mentioned earlier. Therefore, today, i've decided to reward myself with a 3 days school-free weekend! yeah...hehe

2006-07-07T18:23:00.000+08:00

Fat mental-ill and preverted looking man..eww-disgusting!
"It's Wednesday!" i thought. How wonderful. Apparently it's the only day of the week which i can experience a life experienced by every other normal student. - Return home from school at 1.10 p.m. How exciting ><" Got myself in the lrt with tt and ridz...owh..love the lrt when it's not sardine-packed! The air cond! Excellent. Especially during scorching hot days. Then after that, as usual, we went to the kelana jaya station and waited for the bus. 900-B that is. A very 'rare' bus...i've always wonder. Do all these bus company have a policy? they're not efficient at all. I've experienced a 2 hours ++ waiting for the silly bus. Ehem ehem...where's your punctuality?! Ok..continue with my tale. We waited for maybe half an hour that day ( and that's considered quite a short wait) while waiting...i was bored. I threw my 50 cent coin up and down and once, it fell and rolled away from me -.-" Then, there was this man standing behind me (from god knows since when) helped me pick it up. I was thinking oh..how kind and took back my coin and of course casualy thank him. Finally, the bus reversed and there...it's ready for it's daily routine! =) Line up line up everyone! i usually sit at the front seat where you face the people in front of you...i don't know how to explain how the seats are placed. Then all the way...there's this "kind" man who helped me pick up my coin a moment ago sat right in front of me. TT said "people don't usually hold camera phone facing the people in fron of them with their finger on the snap button" And that's exactly what that man is doing all the way till i get outta the bus! It's not me being paranoia or whatsoever...i have a feeling that he's been snapping my pictures! Wth right. It wasn't just me...TT who sat beside me noticed as well. They even stared at each other. I was so uneasy all the way...tried to cover my face with my file but i wasn't sure if he was snapping my pictures...T_T how dare him if he did. He was even singing to himself all the way! You should've seen his disgusting-preverted face! Yucks... that's it! Fat mental-ill and preverted looking man! sorry if i'm rude but i was pissed alright...

2006-06-29T20:00:00.000+08:00

I seriously need to clarify this matter!
Everyone, tt is NOT my boyfriend! i'm done clarifying. Thanks for your attention. Goodbye! ><"

2006-06-29T19:28:00.000+08:00

My stamina gone liao...
Yesterday...went home and the clock strucks 2. Maybe later...i'm not sure about the time. Mom ask me to visit the bank to bank in some check. Hurrily i bathed and got ready. tt's gonna fetch me *excited*. XD First time leh tt fetch me. Anyway i waited till 3pm, then only he came fetch me at the bus stop. I was impatient and was thinking to go to his house and what's taking him so long. Then, he drove all the way to pyramid. i want to drive too =(. Sadly, i don't have skill so dad forbid me from driving. T_T The original plan was to go to the bank and pay a visit to menara sunway for some "official" stuff and return home. As i was tired alright. Actually everyday also i'm tired. XD My friends say that it's really out of the blue if on a particular day i say that i'm not tired. The day shall arrive sometime yeah. Ok...then after i went to the bank (t dropped me off there),met Kelvn,went to pyramid, and guess what?! tt's still parking his car. Hahaha...after his grocery shopping, we have decided to go for a movie. So, he called john and syaf too. ^^ I really enjoyed yesterday although by the end of the day i was half dead. We watched Scary Movie 4. My opinion? it's kinda crappy. No sense de the movie. Before that, i actually spent 1 hour ++ at McD reading my mag. Heheh...After the movie, we decided to have dinner together pulak. Went to Bidara, found parking, stood at the back door but we didn't enter. Last minute change... and so, we headed to Bandar Sri Damansara =S I have no idea where is that except that it's located in damansara lah...haha. We actually took 40 minutes to reach that place. tt was singing i think and syaf missed the turn. In total, we actually passed by the plaza tol 4 times. -.-" Trust me, the food there are delicious. We spent RM 51 something on out 'luxurious' for me it's quite lar. I never ate there before mah...We had some kind of fish which is the most delicious of all dishes and finished in the shortest time too ^^, butter cream chicken which made tt goes 'high' and mix vege. Due to out limited budget. Everyone drank ...Ta-da...AIR KOSONG! ><" we waited bloody long for the food to be served. Maybe cos all of us were starving la..it took extra long. lol...went home after that and thanks guys for snapping my picture when i was asleep. -.-" bluetooth spreads my photo all around... anyway my game - KOF is not finished. Syaf!!! i want to continue and break your record! ahaha... see ya tomorrow night. Germany go go go! btw..i reached home at around 10.30 pm and i did all the yadas yadas by 11pm i'm sleeping soundlessly. NO stamina already. So fast tired. I had a great day out with you guys and miss those days we spent together. ><" Miss you guys very much!!! Love ya too =)

2006-06-26T21:27:00.000+08:00

You must be kidding me~
Came to think of it, this is the first time i really stayed back in school for librarian duty. I was some how hoping that i can go home but, i managed to stay back because the seniors said duty is on. Okay~ Thank god i wasn't alone. It was the most boring duty day i've ever encountered. They apparently didn't prepare anything to teach us. Yeah...they managed to teach us some stuff. We only learned what has been taught. It's just randomly taught? I think they have to improve by planning first. I understand that everyone's busy...but hey, come on! i'm not free either. I have my stuff to do too ><" I've spent 3 hours at the library walking up and down, talking, seeing the seniors figuring what to teach us =S. And of course i learnt a 'lil something lar... when i mean a 'lil, i mean a 'lil. I am not angry but just a 'lil upset. Dissapointed. At first, i thought that they were very efficient people but, i guess there isn't much different in every school. At least, let us go home earlier if tehre's nothing for us to do...Ya ya...i know we can do our homework or whatsoever we want to do there, but i prefer doing it at home. The 'room' is in a real mess and the library ... can say completely empty lar....There's only come chairs and 2 tables ><" Sigh..anyway next time i hope that i won't be wasting me time anymore. I have a feeling that people in this school of mine really need to organize things in a more proper way. I'm not saying that i'm good but no offence, k? =) It's just an opinion of mine ><"

2006-06-25T12:15:00.000+08:00

Build a strong, loving bond with your bunny =)
This is an article i accidently noticed in yesterday's The Star newspaper. Apparently, i did not read newspaper yesterday except this particular article which caught my attention. Maybe to people out there's there's nothing much about it. But to me, it's something neccessary for me to know. And, it's very true too ^^

Sorry for the newspaper's bad condition ><"

It says ...

Rabbits are cautious when it comes to trusting. You will need yo spend a lot of time with your rabbit companion to earn his trust, so you can develop a strong,loving realtionship with him. When you do earn his trust, tou will be delighted by the closeness that develops and contunually amazed by what a wonderful companion your rabbit it for you.

1) Speak softly and do not speak in high-pitched tones or screetches because rabbits' ears are very sensitive to loud noises. (My bunnies freak out whenever there's a thunder and at first, meeko is even scared when the phone rings. Hehe)

2) Read a book or just sit down there with your hands in your lap and let your rabbit decise when to check you out. He will. Rabbits are curious and quite daring when they feel safe. ( yeah...she even lie down on my paper when i'm doing my work with her or perhaps chew off the end of my assignments or bite my books...especially my SPM physics revision book...obvious they are not fond of physics. Me neither XD)

3) Always approach your rabbit from the front side of his head, so he can see you. If you approach from above his head, he will either run away from you or attack you for fear you are a bird who is hunting him.(doesn't happen to me...maybe i don't look like a bird no matter from which side i approach ><")

4) Offer your rabbit a treat: a small piece of banana, small carrot, or a handful of his favourite grass. (ha..my bunny is smart. her favourite food? Corn nuggets...which costs me rm7.20 for one small bottle.More expensive than my own food! ><)

5) Always extend your hand toward your rabbit with fingers together at the back of your hand facing your rabbit. This is far less threatening than the palms as your rabbit knows that you can grab him that way. (you don't want to know how i rub my bunny XD)

6) Spend time with your rabbit everyday to ensure that your bond grows stronger. (i'm with her for at least one hour per day...and guess what, she acts like a dog already....haha)

7) If your rabbit runs away when you try to pat him, nesxt time pick him up and cradle him with his back in the crook of your arm. Then gently stroke both his cheeks at the same time. (My bunny don't run away when i pat her but run away whenever i try to carry her T_T - Never try to carry her unless you want to decorate your skin with some lines =X)

8) Talk softly to your rabbit. Your bunny may not like you doing this often but do this at least once in a week to make your bunny have a deep connection with you. (i do this very often and my parents say that i'm crazy!)

9) Hold your rabbit regularly. Have your rabbit on your lap and sit there talking softly. Let him sniff you and climb up on you. This will strenghten his trust in you.(nice...my bunny sniff sniff then bite! and it hurts! believe me, your lap will perspire if you let her rest on it too long and then numb~...and be real steady or be prepare to gain some scratches! hehehe *evil grin*)

This is my Bunny..Unfortunately, i don't have my Meeko's picture =(

2006-06-25T11:23:00.000+08:00

WTH?! Get lost!
It rain very often nowadays...Almost every evening rain poured. Yesterday, it came earlier. Around 2.30 pm. I was bored as it's the 3rd time i was left alone at home for the day. Therefore, i got my permission and decided to go for a walk by myself. Is it me or what? I have this feeling that everytime i step out of house, it will sure rain. Huh! So evil lar the sky. Anti me...always want me to stay at home ><" Haha... So, i've prepared myself and had a hard time looking for my umbrella. Finally, found my umbrealla and marched out! Tada... the bus stop was empty. How nice i thought. I must've missed the bus or something. There was so many taxis passing by then. But i insisted and carry on waiting for the no-punctuality-bus. It was so windy! It's wise to wear sandals...haha. Eventhough i wore short skirt, i was still a 'lil wet. Suddenly, there this unknown lorry stop by. I was speechless. For the sake of my safety, i ignored them. This two stupid males then ask me where i want to go and say it's raining and stuff...and offered to fetch me. I was like 'get lost idiots!'. But of course i didn't say that. It will be rude. I just shooked my head without even looking at them and walked further from them. Dangerous...stupid guys! The lorry was so small that it looks like it only can fit 2 person. Idiots...there's no way i will enter the lorry, eventhough if there's a thunderstorm brewing. Or unless i lost my mind. If i followed them, then that's certainly not me. What's the worst thing that can happen?! i'll just go home -.-" I ignored them and moved further then they left! Thank god! i was like PHEW! Then guess what... They turned into another road opposite from the spot i am waiting...and talked so loudly, almost like shouting asking for my name! Idiots... Then one of them even sang don't know what every stupid self-written song... i was like "omg...please lah!" Go home and take a mirror and take a good look at yourself. If no mirror, water will do. Idiots!!! =X No offence... but i must admit that some guys are really good for nothing.Nothing more than a bunch of idiots. Well, my mother thought me that i shouldn't talk to strangers ya... XD. Then, i was so relieved when there's other people waiting for the bus...one of them is a girl of course. Even more relieved after that when i saw something else...Here came my savior in shining armour! =D I was so excited and happy when i saw him - My Dad! buahahaha...although he was driving his working van but he looked like a knight to me then. Yay! no need to wait for that lousy bus and passers by looking at you as if you're putting on a free show or what... Finally, i reached my destination in one piece XD. Thank you, dad! You saved me! hahaha...i told my dad about the strangers thing..and i hope that he will fetch me everytime i want to go out or let me drive! ahahahaha..i'm so evil ><"

2006-06-25T11:10:00.000+08:00

Kesian kakiku~
Thursday, i slept from 5 pm to 10.30 pm then 1 am sleep again due to the effectiveness of running all around the school...
Friday, after came home from school, went pyramid with mom and walked for at least 4 hours =S
Saturday, although it was raining, i still went out and walked for 2 hours plus plus.
Sunday morning, go driving 'lesson' with dad...well manual car, my left leg is like...omg omg. so tired!
Next Tuesday, prepare for a nother leg-killin' day...i have to do cat walk with a 3 inches high heel!
Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...save my legs!
How i wish that there's no rehearsal or another practice on Monday! Or else, i'll my legs will be over-used. And the result? i have no idea and i don't want to think about it either. ><"
So, people, do treasure your legs...it's your bus no.11 and you'll die without it.

2006-06-23T20:43:00.000+08:00

Self declared holiday
Today, only 11 people in my class present. What happened? Self declared holiday lorr... Thanks to the orientation thingy yesterday i think. So effective eh the result ><" Really...i can barely feel my legs ><" Ok it's a lil' hyperbola i admit. But, it's been such a long time since i worked out. Run up and down the school is really a "GREAT" exercise. Especially when BB is like built on a hill. Today, we had very selamba time in class. We even took some pictures =D. Have time to sms some more. And found out that tt has souvenirs too -.-" Teacher barely teach today. not even half of the class present. Actually i felt like laying truant too. But...since last friday i was absent...can't do it again or else i'll hear something from my dad saying that i'm a real lazy bum. Sigh, ended up going to school. During PA, teacher just let us copy some questions to do over the weekend and chat away with others while, me, busy smsing. wahaha...nice eh? Small class's real fuhn. Especially when the location of the classroom is like isolated =D Therefore, today, 23rd June 2006, is 6RSB batch 2006's self declared holiday. And heck there's still so many mosquitoes =/

2006-06-22T17:05:00.000+08:00

Soaked
21st June 2006 - a day to remember. Lower sixes are required to stay back after school today. Unless you are admitted to the hospital or die today, you have to stay back. Are they threatening us? o.O" I wonder. Well, quite a number of us stayed back. Except tt of course. What we did huh?! We are placed under the sun...Sounded like animals, and got our face painted. -.-" Interesting enough? Then, something began...something to remember. It's like a station game. From one check-point to another, we had to run all around the school. Now, i'm exhausted. We had to deep our faces into a bowl of flour to seek for a sweet with our mouth! Imagine that! (Thanks Cassie for getting the sweet out). We looked like a bunch of Sakais. You will never know how well is the condition of our school's field until you step on it. It's horrible! Everyone's shoes are brown! And the fertilizers smells like cow dunk! Omg...tomorrow wear what to school? Sandals? Can? Luckily i've got another pair. Our group who roars (harimau) managed to finish the games first. There was a total of 7 check-points if i'm not mistaken. At the last station, we were thrown with water balloons while singing Negaraku...-.-" It was already raining by then...That's why we were all soaked. Wet, sticky, ... Thanks god no one had BO! Phew~ I think our underwear were wet too ><". How mean~ Anyway, we got to know our seniors and friends better and next year is our turn! wahahahah XD. I went home early 'cos my dad came to fetch me... After that, i have no idea what happened...Tired~

2006-06-21T14:48:00.000+08:00

Happenings...
I've been skipping classes since 2 days ago due to the school's library week. Thank god today we "librarians" (not official ones) need not get out from class. However, when finally i can attend classes, teachers are not entering -.-" Other than that, another thing came up. Fashion show -.-" Once again, those who are involved are required to skip classes to do cat walk?! Chey...it's been so long since i wear my heels and believe me, it hurts. Especially when it's 3 inches high. Sadly to say, i only have 3 inches heels. Anything lower than that is all worn out because i wear them so often. Hehe... Since Monday, us, lower sixes began receiving letters from our seniors. It's the junior-senior thing. Finally, today i got mine. And Sam got 2!! XD She now need to do double job XD... Erm..let's see my first impression on the letter is..."why is the writing so small?!" micro i said. ><" It's a real simple letter though. It's like that 'senior' of mine is too busy to do all these. Maybe he wrote it this morning or just a few minutes before passing it to me. =S Hopefully not. I'm a person who really like to write letter. Sadly, my pen-pals are too busy and we seldom write to each other already. It's been 6 years. So fast. We used to write 'essays' to each other but it is always so fun to read the letters. Especially when that particular person wrote it with all his/her heart. I feel that communicating through letter is an excellent way to maintain friendships. Although now, we have sms and e-mails and stuff which are faster and easier. However, i still prefer the old traditional way - snail-mail. I occasionally collect stamps, so i can add all the stamps to my collection whenever i receive a letter. Of course it's mostly local stamps. Anyway...there's nothing much to post these few days...as everyone is busy with their own stuff...ja ne =)

2006-06-20T18:40:00.000+08:00

O-Nite
I'm currently a BBian. My previous school which is SMK Bandar Sunway never had such thing as "Prom Night". Therefore, i haven't gone to any of such occasion. Our Form 6 orientation night is around the corner. However, before that, there's a task that we need to accomplish. Getting signatures from our seniors! So tiring! If we don't get their signature, each will be charged RM0.50. So there's 86 seniors which means we'll have to pay RM43 if we do not wish to trouble ourselves chasing them for 'autographs'. Other than that, everyone of us lower 6 'juniors' will also receive a letter which i call them love letters from our seniors. Guy gets girl and girl gets guy. Their identity will be kept unknown till O-nite. So, no point cracking our head guessing who they are now. Might just use our brain on something else. Heheh... Anyway, so far, form 6 is quite fun. Maybe all the stress haven't hit us but i guess it's work hard, play hard eh... Here's some info on the O-nite.

SMK(L) Bukit Bintang O-Nite

Venue : Eastin Hotel
Date: 21st July 2006
Time : 6.30 p.m.
Dress code : Strictly formal
Ticket price : RM 85 (Form 6 BBians) , RM100 (non-BBians)

Sore dake...Ja ne ^^

2006-06-18T11:14:00.000+08:00

Happy Father's Day , dad!
It's father's day today. To be honest, it actually slipped of my mind -.-" I usually celebrate mother's day more celebratively. Father's day are very casual. Plus, my dad is usually working, including Sundays -.-" That's the part i don't like. His job is never punctual. I mean, the time is not fixed. But it gives him freedom. However, time to spend with family are also less of course. Well, you have to give and take, ne? =) This year, i'm not giving my dad anything. This is because, i spent almost all my money on mother's day and so, i'm broke now -.-" How sad. next time, i shall plan properly to not to spend all my money in a day. Sigh...so now, i can't even afford to get him a cake or something. However, i usually don't give because he don't look happy eventhough i give him something. And thank you is never there. And so far, i haven't wish him not even once before. That's saddening right. I mean as a daughter...Sigh. But you can't blame me. My dad's dictionary missed out the word romantic and the phrase expressing your feelings is not there. He'll always say that i'm wasting money buying unecessary things. So, i rather spend it on myself. If i make him something, he'll say that i'm wasting time. He always say that it's better to spend the time cleaning up the house or MY room!...He doesn't show any appreciation nor happiness when i give him something so, i'm already numb. With gift or without gift, with wishes or without wishes are just the same. I'll just say it here then, which he will never read and will never know...Happy Father's Day, dad! Thanks for everything. And i'm sorry about everything i've done that upset you. Please forgive me. Sayonara chichi (otosan/chichi = father)

2006-06-18T10:46:00.000+08:00

When time passes by...
I've always went shopping with mom but yesterday, i went with dad. It all started when i was so bored at home and wanted to get out from the house as i was home alone. Just when i stepped out from my front door, it was raining. So, i end up spending a day with dad. One thing that i noticed is when 2 person is together for long enough, they tend to hide their feelings. Especially when it comes to love and care for one another. When, i'm with mom and dad's not around, it's obvious that mom cares for dad very much. She's always saying that " when your dad comes home...bla bla bla", " Dad says...bla bla bla", "Dad likes/don't like this and that", "Ask your dad", etc. But when dad's around, things go the goes differently. Dad's always complaining about mom when she's around. Yesterday, when mom's not with us (as she was enjoying herself in karaoke) dad tend to buy stuff where mom wanted to buy. However, he doesn't act the same when she's around. He'll always say that she's recklessly spending money and buying unecessary things. Although she likes something very much, dad will always show that face of his and we will end up not buying those things categorised as "unecessary" by him -.-" But when i'm with either one of them, they will always looking out for things that each other like and wish to own. Why can't they show their care for each other when they're together? I guess that's what will happen when you've been together with someone for a long time. You tend to expect the other person to understand what you're thinking all the time. This can get very risky as misunderstanding is commonly happening due to this matter. Or perhaps they're in the genes...lol. I don't really express my feelings much too ^^. Everytime, i'll just go "uhuh" or "it's ok" or "never mind"... There's still so much more to learn and adapt eh?! =)

2006-06-17T23:58:00.000+08:00

I'm Tagged again by SAM!!!
Hi...i'm tagged everytime i visit Sam's blog...-.-" heheh
This is it...

10 years ago I was:
-A skinny girl (I'm a lady now =D)
-Don't care much about my studies
-A very shy person
-Studying in SK Subang Jaya
-Very simple-minded (kid mah...)

5 years ago I was:
-Attending school in SMK Bandar Sunway
-Understanding the importance of studies
-Working very hard to get good grades (I am still trying to do that now)
-Neglecting the importance of proper English
-Getting very used to my ex-school's condition

1 year ago I was:
-Anxious about SPM
-Trying to attend Chemistry tuition which I quit in a month’s time
-Still thinking that I will continue my hip hop lessons
-Wishing to continue my Japanese class
-Cracking my head to decide what I want to do after SPM (now, I need to think what I want to do after STPM pulak -.-')

yesterday I was:
-Talking on the phone for 1 and a half hour till 2.30 am
-Sad in the morning because my Bunny hurt her arm/hand
-Trying to be an animal doctor -.-"
-Doing Biology notes and trying to do math which I can't
-Bored because my credit expired, happy because my dad reloaded for me =D

5 most recent songs I listened to:
-Zhang Dung Liang – Dan ni gu dan ni hui xiang qi shui
-Ni shi wo jui ai de ren
-DDR Bethoven's 5th (Techno Remix)
-Listen to your heart
-Shakira ft. Wyclef Jean - Hips Don't Lie

5 songs I know all the words to:
-Country Road (Jap. Version)
-Fruit Basket Theme Song (Jap. Version)
-Richie Ren (Lang Hua Yi Duo Duo)
-Momiji's Song!
-Erm… what else ar-Westlife's My love? =S (I'm bad in lyrics)

5 ideal places for running away to:
-My room
-My Bunny’s place
-Market (it's not really ideal but I've been there when I have no idea where I'm heading to)
-Paradise!
-No idea already... you tell me...

5 items I really want:
-Good grades in exams (I have to work for it alright)
-Continue hip hop classes
-Continue Japanese lessons
-Get 100 Bunnies ><(this is a childish dream) and a brother (it's impossible)
-To get to drive asap! ><

5 things I should be doing right now:
-Sleeping
-Studying
-Doing my homework and assignments
-Lay around with my pets
-Eat?! I'm hungry! ='(

5 biggest joys in life:
-The moment I got my SPM result (joy of tears fell...I have never been happier)
-Going to the pet shop with him…
-Having Bunny (and Meeko now)=D
-Get my first Paycheck!
-Seeing people around me happy (when they are, so am i =)

5 people I'm tagging:
-Max (max arr..where are you ar?)
-Woody
-Sying
-Kwang Hua =D
-Pauline (do you ever visit my blog??!! =S)

2006-06-17T22:31:00.000+08:00

Tagged again!
I've been tagged by sam again~
Anyway, since i don't feel like doing anything else, i'll just do it =D

instructions: name 20 people you can think of at the top of your head. don't read the questions before you write, and tag 5 people to do the survey.

1. Samantha =D
2. Tik Tsin
3. Eva (welcome home!)
4. Kelvin
5. Guek Mei
6. Pauline
7. Syafiq (donkey yay!)
8. Chew Kwang Hua
9. Yun Wai
10. Jeff
11. Cassandra
12. John
13. Cindy
14. Sook Theng
15. Choon Seng
16. Bunny (is she a person?)
17. Nagulan (ahaha gunalan)
18. Max (kawaii)
19. Pang Shen
20. Erm...My dad? (it's father's day, dude!)

Questions:
1. How did you meet 14 (Sook Theng)?
Met her in SMK Bandar Sunway 6 years ago...This brings back loads of memories.

2. What would you do if you had never met 1 (Samantha)?
Oh...Samantha? ahaha...most probably not studying form 6 in BB =D

3. What would you do if 20 (My dad??!!) and 9 (Yun Wai -.-") dated you?
I would love to go on a date with my dad alright =D But i think he won't date me...ahaha..Erm Yun Wai ar...ahaha i guess he won't date me XD...So, there's nothing i can do =)

4. Would 6 (Pauline) and 17 (Nagulan) make a good couple?
Ahahahahahaha...Pauline ang Nagulan? IMPOSSIBLE...although they don't know each other but it's nto gonna happen...i can't imagine it! Oh no-no...XD

5. Describe 3 (Eva)
Eva's a great person! The class gets more cheerful and merry with her around. Really miss her! And one more interesting thing is...her hometown's in Spain...and she's meeting Shakira there...hehe just joking. =D Nice to meet you!

6. Do you think 8 (Kwang Hua) is attractive?
Ah...i've only seen him once! Can't really tell...heheh

7. Say something about 7 (syafiq)
This is interesting. He looks like a star in Shrek! Really...no offence though...he's a very funny guy. A frienf i know 6 years ago..and we're actually from the same primary school too. =D gets excited easily and he sure is glad that he met Hana =D

8. Do you know anything about no 12's (john's) family?
I know who is his mom, dad, sis, sis's boyfriend and his sheep-dog. Just know only =)

9. What is 8 (Kwang Hua's) favourite?
Erm...didn't ask him before...-.-"

10. What would you do if 11 (Cassandra) confess that he/she likes you?
Har? cassie ar? i will tell her that i like her too ^^

11. What language does 15 (Choon Seng) speak?
Cantonese with me. =) Mandarin with some people. BM with malay people, English with banana people...ahahaha so bad lar..just joking XD

12. Who is 9 (Yun Wai) going out with?
Erm..i don't know? Eh..Yun Wai...who ah??!!

13. How old is 16 (Bunny) now?
Oh mu lovely Bunny is...erm...actually i'm not very sure how old is she =X 2 i think...i just assume that every chinese new year she gets one year older. It's not my fault for not knowing ok! The fella before didn't tell me the exact age! I think 2 lah...Young leh??!! XD *calm calm*

14. When was the last time you talked to 13 (Cindy) ?
Oh erm, first day of World cup! =D

15. Who is 2's (Tik Tsin) favourite singer?
Bee do you sing? If you do, then it's you =D...ahaha didn't ask him also -.-"

16. Would you date no 4 (Kelvin) ?
Lol...dated him loads of times =) still will date or not ah...ahahahaha...who knows?! XD

17. Would you date 7 (Syafiq) ?
Even though i want to date him, he won't want to go out with me also ='( That's sad right....ahahahaha he only dates Hana...And i don't want Hana to hate me too ^^" *run away*

18. Is 15 (Choon Seng) single?
Maybe...ehehe long time didn't talk to him liao...should be gua. =S

19. What's 10's (Jeff) last name?
Erm...Jeff? What's his name already ar...*thinks hard* I remember the exec used to call him something that sounds like Fah Fah...XD lol...memories~

20. Would you ever consider being in a relationship with 11 (Cassandra) ?
Omg! Cassie? NO! I'm straight you know and so is she...

21. What school does 3 (Cindy) go to?
Taylors! She got full scholarship =) Smart girl!

22. Where does 6 (Pauline) live?
Terrace house in Bandar Sunway...hehe very near my house only...=)

23. What's your favourite thing about 5 ( Guek Mei)?
She's a lamer! jkjk...XD She knows people around her very well...Know me very very well that is...hehehe have good social skills...well...she's still a lamer! =P

I'm tagging (be happy! you're chosen) XD
1.Pauline
2.Chew Kwang Hua
3.Eva
4.John
5.Max

Adios~

2006-06-17T21:39:00.000+08:00

Boku...
Since my computer was reformatted without any back-ups for my files long time ago, i lost all my pictures. ='( What's the worst that can happen after that? My digital camera also "mati". Sigh...so, dissapointly, i can't take any pictures of myself with black hair (the color faded) and my new Meeko and my Bunny's wound. Anyway, i think that it's too boring without any pictures, so these are all that i manage to get...Enjoy~

This is me...at the park =)

Once upon a time in school...GM and i

My buddies and i (me,paul,GM)

Black Gang - Paul,john,me,tt

Me...smelling my bag??!! No lar...ahaha just trying to be mysterious XD

Erm..actually there's still some more..but uploading pictures somehow is very slow..so people without much patient like me...manage only to get these displayed...hehe...

2006-06-17T21:15:00.000+08:00

Love
Lately, i found an anime entittled Honey and Clover which one of my friend lent me since quite sometime ago. i began watching since Friday and i'm in love with it. i've reached the 16th episode in 2 days time. At first, i thought that it's quite funny but as the storyline flows, there's quite a lot about love in it too^^. A character named Ayu was deeply in love in a guy who's feeling is attached to another lady. Feelings, especially love makes miracle happen. it can make u feel as if you are the happiest person on earth. On the other hand, it can also make you as if you are the most miserable one. When two person is deeply in love, and they can't be together, all you can do is to be friends together. When someone's really close to you tell you that he'she loves you, apprediate it. Love is not a game. Love is a feeling born from our trust and respect for others. Love is not limited to only one person. Therefore, love the people around you and treasure everyone of them. You will never feel the lost until you really lose someone. Especially someone you truly have feelings for.

"Love is not about loving a perfect person, but loving an unperfect person perfectly."

When you love someone, you pray that they are happy everyday. When they are, you are too. =) It's really a wonderful thing. Perhaps the most wonderful thing on earth. Love unites unknown people together and enables them to live life to the fullest. When you are with that special someone, love makes you feel safe and secure. As if being with him/her makes you feel like you're in haven. To love someone is to trust someone. Without feelings like this, there's nothing much about life. It makes out life more interesting and is also a guidance to some of us. Life is a long wavy journey. Feelings let us go through it's ups and downs together. Therefore, to my friends and family, I love you guys! Muaxxxxxxxxxxx =)

2006-06-17T20:49:00.000+08:00

Bunny's injured
It's been 2 days since i posted. Yesterday morning, i was so sad. My bunny injured her hand. It was a deep cut. I keep my pets at the balcony...well not a very spacious one though. it's quite pack in there. Only can fit one human which usually, it's me. I can spent like an hour or more there everyday with my bunnies and guinea pigs =) Somehow, it's peaceful. Yesterday, i skipped school. [I'm so sorry to the librarians; i was supposed to stay back but i didn't make it. I guess i'll have to cover up next week ><"; sorry to 6AS koasalia...i failed to turn up with my clothes, and sorry to my PA team members...i missed out the presentation! ><" so sorry everyone!] i was down alright on thursday night due to some 'sickness'. i slept till around 9 the next morning, and as usual, i went to feed my pets. I was sitting there and bunny went behind me. There's these fence or maybe wire fencing to keep my pets from falling down from the 4th floor. [Sadly, there isn't anything but some metal bars there last time and one of my pig actually fell down ='( it's very saddening] Then, mom did those wire fence behind those bars. i really have no idea how to describe it. Those who saw it before will know. Those who hasn't just imagine lah...hehe. one of those sharp wire which it poking out at the bottom actually stuck into my bunny's hand accidently. she got panic and so was i, she began struggling. she pulled her hand off and there, the wire just sliced off her skin. The wound was more or less 1cm long and quite deep. I couldn't see the cut until i searched deep within her fur. i was about to cry when i saw the wound. Somehow, i feel guilty.I didn't help her to free her hand safely. And now, there's a deep cut there. It must be disasterously pain. It's as if i can feel it. I got so 'panic' and worried that i immediately carried her inside and sniped off the fur around the wound. then applied some medicine (sime kind of edible herbal oil) then i've never left her side. I was such a paranoia that i feared that the cut might reached her bone or something. I've even thought that maybe the wound need to be stitched. Or maybe i should bring her to the vet or something. Luckilly, she can still move her arm. Then, i tried to dress the wound but she doesn't like it. Then she began licking it. If she does that, means it hurts alot...However, after a day, it's better and the wound is healing. I'm definitely going to change those wire fence to plastic ones...

2006-06-12T21:24:00.000+08:00

My dream lover =)
I've been tagged! Thank you sam o.O"
Oh well, here goes...

1. He has to be...
Some one who loves me;
Some one who doen't 'calculate' the love we share;
I think i will fall for him if it's the right time if he loves me...
I would be glad if he loves me more of course...but not less.
Some one who doesn't take love as a game but a true deep feeling. =) Love ya!^^

2. Mr. dream lover should be...
Some one who is responsible for not only me but himself too.
He should know what his goals in life are and never fails to realize it. [Ganbate!!!]
"Say already means must do it,ok?!" Know the right meaning of this...
He shouldn't be just saying things for fun because that makes me feel not secure in a way =S
Well, acyion works better than words, ne?

3. He is a guy who...
Never make empty promises.
Making promises but not make them more than words or even worse, forgot about it!; hurts..
Don't try to show off by making promises if you can't deal with it....ok?

4. I would love him to be...
Some one who is friendly, can mix well with people.
Not too quiet, not too talkative in a way...
Knows how to react to the situation and understands stuff before taking action...
(Don't just MARCH!!! and end up banging a pole or even worse, a fine wall =S)
Rational that is...and matured too ^^ in his very own way.

5. Boy, can you...
Understand the situation i'm in...and understands my needs.
I'm willing to go through thick and thin with you, and i hope you will too ^^
I might be childish sometimes so can you bear with it?
Some one who's feel free to voice out his mind and feeling to me...
Not a paranoid! (if he's panic, i'll be more panic! So. please stay calm =/)

6. He's not...
Some one who care too much of physical appearance (this doesn't mean don't care at all)
Some one who dump old stuff when he got new ones...=S
Some one who spend money like water
Some one who can't make me feel secure
A guy who is too fond of physical contact =X (respect!respect!)

7. He must be...
Taller than me of course... ( i can wear heels then, heheh joking XD)
It's just a criteria i have...hehe
Not younger than me! no no... i don't safe no matter how matured he is...
There'll be some conflict~

8. Most important...
That i have feelings for him and he's in my heart.
He has to love me for who i am...accept me like how i am. (never ever try to change me..)
Trust and respect is the key... It's simple... right time, right mood, right situation...
It's never wrong for us to be together then...

He's a very special person in his very own way and i will love hiim for that... Good luck in searching everyone =) May you find your dream lover soon ...

You've been tagged...
- Woody =D
- Sying XD
- Max (where are you???)
- Wei Wei
- Pauline
- Guek Mei (if you still blog o.O)
- John... =S
- You! ( congrats! you're lucky number 8!) XD

2006-06-12T20:53:00.000+08:00

Aloha BB =S
After 2 weeks break, finally everyone's back to school once again. Another beginning for the oh-so-bored lifestyle. Which mine is actually almost the same everyday. You can say, i lead a not-very-interesting life. Today, it's the first time for me and most the lower sixes to attend the weekly assembly in BB. I noticed that there isn't not so many students in BB. I think my previous school has more. =/ Or maybe because they're still enjoying their holidays.And it's interesting to know that Eva's hometown's in SPAIN..hehe. The assembly actually took over our LIBRARY period. =( How sad. And i thought i could catch a short nap or at least do my remaining maths homework during that time. Then, i came blur at the school song singing part. Obviously i DON"T KNOW the lyrics. And i actually laughed a bit at the way the prefect conducted. Sorry...i didn't see before. My bad My bad. I can't even hear what the boys were singing -.-". The hall was sooo stuffy. There wasn't enough air for everyone! Please...use the fan next time ok? There's so many fans but none of 'em were turned on. Expcept those if front of course 'cos the teachers were there. I yawned my way through the assembly. I wasn't the only person who is tired though. Eheh...can't blame us. We're just back from HOLIDAYS!!! PA came after that. You know it's right that Ridzuan (sorry if i spelled wrongly) questioned that is she or it's us..that she doesn't want to teach? She blasts us with assignments from the moment she enter. Great...now we have 3 PA assignments to do. PA is not going to be an interesting subject. Trust me =.= Everything went on normally until chemistry periods. MY teacher was so GREAT that she asked us...
"Oh, you all are in my class?" (somehing like that)
Everyone was like...-.-" ya?!
Omg...she's so blur. But can be real funny also...ahahaha
i had a great laugh until my eyes were fileed with tears...
She was asking questions then TT simply shake his head...and she said
"Tsin Tik, ( forgot what she said)..." Tsin Tik!!! wahahahahahaha...you should have seen her face expression....ahahahaha i was laughing for the next few minutes. ehem...ok...ahahahaha
Then she called Nagulan Gunalan...ahahahahahaha... Let's hope that she don't call me Fei Voon in the next class eh...ahahahaha...XD She was so funny.
And so, a day in BB ended.
And i came home with more mosquitoes bites...-.-"

2006-06-11T16:51:00.000+08:00

A confession has to be made
A confession has to be made...How do i confess? I don't know...Ahh...so nothing to post. -.-" Forgive me for my sillyness.

2006-06-11T16:39:00.000+08:00

I had a haircut!
I know i know, i've said that i want to leave my hair long again so that i could tie them. But i can't help it. It's like i'm addicted in cutting my hair =S Maybe i'm a weirdo. Once i started cutting my hair to shoulder length a year ago, i think i've had at least 3 haircuts in less than a year time. Oh well, my hair's short again .But this time, i kept my tail. My orangee tail. Hehe...I love it. Yesterday, when my mom wants to cut my brother's hair, i asked her to cut for me too and suprisingly she agreed. Well, i regretted a lil' cos' it didn't turn out to be very nice. But, my friend says it's not that ugly. So maybe i'm a lil' comforted la. But it's disturbing alright. I wonder how i'm going to go to school now. Sigh...Dicipline teachers, please spare me...Onegai~ Lol.My hair colour also faded a bit. It's not entirely black anymore. Slightly reddish. Not raddish. Sigh...currently, i'm still not allowed to drive =( When's my P gonna arrive. Uncle ar...Why so slow? Although if i got my P, i'm still not allowed to drive. People scare i die or something or maybe causes other people to die. =S Pray that i get to drive soon. At least i'll gain more freedom. Hopefully. Minus the petrol money, everything's gonna be good if i can drive. Yeah..i can't wait. TT, let's deco my car! Dad, please fix everything that should have been fixed long time ago before giving it to me. Thank you. TT, come become driver! It's gonna be fun! -.-" I'm crapping already...Better stop. Ahh..she's eating another mini cornetto~

2006-06-11T16:20:00.000+08:00

Last day...
Woke up at 10 something this morning, thought i can finally have some peace before school starts and finish everything that is supposed to be done a long time ago. After my family left then only i get out of my bed and my room.Ahh..peace! A day at home alone. How nice. Although a part of me don't want to be alone, but i've always like quiet places. Places which brings peace to my mind. Although my house is nothing like the "paradise" i where i wish to be, it's better off without those "brats" wandering around. Quiet places enable my mind to relax. Close to nature places is the best. Ichiban ^^. Harh..back to my story... I only had like 2 hours alone. Sad. Then there she comes...My 8-year-old cousin!!! Another "brat". Sigh...i know it's not good to call them brats but i can't think of another word which suits them .You can say that i don't really like kids...And there goes..I had to babysit her for the rest of the day! I pray hard that my parents come home soon. The sooner the better. I ordered pizzas. But i only had two slices. My tongue hurts and my gum's killing me. The wisdom tooth is like growing forever. No matter how tempting or how delicious is the food, it won't work with me. Not now. My friend then came to my house to borrow some or maybe all of my Korean movies...And how brilliant she is to ask out loud " is he your boyfriend?" ... I was like...-.-" NO! It's a natural reaction but think back, maybe i reacted to fast. But it's still the truth and i should accept it. knock me awake please. It's my own decision. I wish to go for a trip which i can't. Stupid me ><. Then, i got my cakes. Suddenly i felt like eating cake. So i asked someone to do me a favor. Hehe..Thanks a lot. I had the cake. At least it's soft and i feel less "suffering" chewing it. At the end, i manage only to do some of my homeworks and my plan for the day failed miserably. If you ask me to describe myself in 3 words now, i'll tell you that i'm saddening, pathetic and hopeless. Mom...Dad...Sis..Bro...come home quickly!!! I'm tired. I want to sleep! But i can't leave her alone~ Afraid that she might kill my pets? put them running all around the house? Finishing the mini cornettos in my freezer? Ah..my brother and sister would love me for that. You guys, please return faster!!!

2006-06-10T12:53:00.000+08:00

Maybe i'm wrong
By everyway except how he talked to me last night, i think that i really hurt him very deeply. It's a wound? A very deep one perhaps. Maybe it's just a way to make me feel less guilty about my decision or maybe it's my own opinion to comfort myself all the way... Which one is true? Is it really that he is ok? Or he is not? He may be look fine but inside it's different. Seeing him in this shape makes me worry. It does concern me as i feel that i'm guilty. He did accepted and respect my decision and i thank him in everyway but i really really don't wish to see him sad. What can i do to cheer him up? Maybe i'm selfish all the way. Conceited. Only thinking about myself. I did considered his point of view but i can't do something that betrays my feeling right now. I mean in the sense that what i should i do now. All that i can say is now is not the right time. I learnt a lot from that relationship and i've never regretted. Neither did i regret making this decision too. I do hope that time will heal him quicker. All i can do is just hope. Please stay happy.

2006-06-10T12:14:00.000+08:00

Fate
I think i need to re-blog before i go get my food. My entry for yesterday was corrupted! Not knowing why, i think i must learn how to save as draft next time. Went to Sunway Pyramid yesterday with my sister. I made her go with me *evil grin* hehee... We went for a movie...Actually the new movie, Cars wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. It's quite worth my money. Hehe. There was sooo many people in the cinema. It's quite a nice show. Well, it's about cars of course. Haha...Hmm yesterday, same time, same movie, same room, Kelvn was in there too with his friend of course. I din't notice. Neither did he.Fate is fate eh? Then, of course as usual, visited Vincci also. It's like it's a place which i must visit everytime i go there. Oh well, had lots of memories there. Then, we talked...had a not too long, not too short conversation. Ended up no where also. Cos' i was like a piece of wood. So sorry ><" Anyway, last night, things went on nicely. At least it's better than before. And we ended it peacefully^^ i don't know how to describe it. Do you believe in fate? Well i do. Now it's just not the right time. As he said...i'm still 18. I don't deny that cos' there's lots more to play and enjoy.Maybe i survive better as a lone fighter now (only in certain way. I do need my friends as i lovey them very much) haha. Sa, who knows what will happen next right. I think that we should just go with the flow. I've never think very far due to some reasons and i'm still uncertain about quite a large number of things. I think that now is just not the right time for me to get into a relationship. We'd agreed on that and...just let it be that way bah...Anyway, in this case, i think that we still can be friends. *i know, i know it's easy to say* But anyway, i don't want to lose a friend like him ^^. So, maybe like this things will be better for both sides. Hopefully it is. We shall let fate decide it all...wahaha food!!!

2006-06-10T11:45:00.000+08:00

One more day till school re-open!
Yesterday was kinda a busy day for me. As i spent less than 8 hours at home?! Hmm last night went to Gm's house. Went mamak cos' Cindy haven't eat yet. And how smart i was to not to bring money when i left my house. Sigh..I just had coke anyway. Luckily i had my dinner already. Then, later on at 11pm we went to the "top student's" house again. Haha... John then came. He finally gave me my 2 months late birthday present. Thank you!!^^ Somehow i should be happy cos' after 2 months of my birthday and i'm still receiving present. Haha... Then, we talked and talked and talked while watching world cup; the first match. haha...(John...Germany won instead of "Costa Rico" XD 4-2 weh) Anyway i had to go home before twelve. I was just 10 minutes late and when i reached home, my mom starts her lecture at me. 10 minutes only!!! For some reason, i don't feel sleepy at all. Then, i end up doing something which i rarely do. Watch football match. I didn't watch the whole match though. I was with my dad and my bunnies, so i was talked more. And chasing that mischievious Meeko who runs all around the house and sniffs and nibs and eat everything she thinks it's edible. Well, she thinks. Then i think around 1 i went to bed already. I was on my bed alright. But i selpt at 3.30 something. So, i'm officially a zombie with flu today. I had the longest phone conversation ever .I actually felt better after talking with Him and he got his answers too[i hope].It's just not the right time now. However, i didn't sleep well. That's because i have a feeling that my dad knows that i've been on the phone all along. Anyway, it won't happen already but it bothers me. I slept and woke and slept and woke... when i was finally asleep, i had a phone call...My cousins are outside of my house! 10 something...i just glanced at the clock -.-" Ok..time to wake up. Opened the door with my sleepy face...Then we chattered and entertained ourselves with my bunnies...And after that, i'm here blogging. And now, i'm done blogging...It's time for food!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Food here i come!!! I'm hungry since last night! Food!!! XD [Oh ya, before i leave, GM,Cindy,John,Jack...Enjoy your trip and HAPPY BIRTHDAY GM =)]

2006-06-08T01:10:00.000+08:00

Meeko
I bought Meeko. I don't know why but i just named her spontaniously. Meeko is all i can think about. A white rabbit which is very young. Only sized about 1/5 my Bunny's size. I can carry her with a single hand. So fragile. So soft, so innocent. Unfortunately, she is not welcomed. My Bunny seems to dislike her. She bites. I tried to stop her and her teeth landed on my thumb. I bleed a lil'. I desperately need to figure out a way to mix them. The scent. My pigs followed Meeko's back all the way. I'm afraid that they will bite her too. I guess guinea pigs are more decent creatures. They mix well. Hopefully, they won't go against her. I should be real happy that i've got a new rabbit at home, but things does not go the way you plan them. Sometimes, it opposes your plans.

2006-06-08T00:57:00.000+08:00

Listen to whom?
Listen to my heart? Listen to my head? Listen to other people's? What should i do?! I'm really lost. It's harder than i thought it would be. Everything started with a smile but ended with tears. Starting something wonderful is easy (at least u felt wonderful at that moment) but ending it is hard. Real hard. I tried to sleep but i can't sleep well. I can't control my emotions. Am i worried? Am i sad? But tears didn't fall. I really really wish to have a nice cry; cry out loud like a kid; but i can't. Why wouldn't it fall? I hope that it rains, but it didn't. I can't smile like i used to, talk cheerfully like i used to; in fact, i can't do anything properly. Holidays are going to end soon, and i hope that i can pay full attention at my works. Forget all the fancy ideas and just go straight to the point. Studies' the most important thing that i should do now. Never let your parents get dissapointed with you; which i just did. In fact, i made quite anumber of people got dissapointed in me. Accept the truth, i'm just somehow hopeless. Pathetic. Saddening. I really want to ask...How are you now? Ask...Can we just not think abotu everything else? There's billions of questions floating in my mind. My heart pounding. "It's so dramatic" I thought. But it's true. I can't stop myself from thinking about ***. They say it's just because i'm not used to the current situation, maybe it is, maybe it's not. Who knows. I honestly don't know. Why is it so hard for me? Why can't i let go completely? These are questions only can be answered by Time. Hopefully i'll get back on track soon...and start anew. I'm so sorry. May God bless everyone.

2006-06-07T17:41:00.000+08:00

I'm Pathetic
This 2 week holidays has been the worst holiday i've ever had. I've did many many stupid things and made loads of stupid decisions. The worst of all is what happened last night. How i wish i could stay away from home for sometime. Last night only i found out that i'm staying in a house which is actually not mine. So i left. How i wish i need not return. But i can't. Sigh, the past is the past. I owe Kelvn. I'm really sorry Kelvn. I don't know what else i can do. I can't think of anything to say other than sorry. I know that apologising now is useless, but there's really isn't any other word that appears in my mind now-Which i can say to you. Hopefully after sometime, we'll be better. Sigh i am really off track now.

2006-06-06T15:56:00.000+08:00

I want to...
I've been thinking...Should or shouldn't i get a new rabbit@bunny? Maybe this time i'll just get myself a new normal rabbit as they cost cheaper. Much more cheaper. I think i can get one around RM20. Rather that buying some other breed at petshops which at least going to cost me RM60. Of course those are more cute but i can't afford. Too bad. Anyway, my mom gave me a huge and bright red light. She wouldn't let my BUNNY have baby nor let me buy another one. I only have Bunny and 2 guinea pigs now. Lately, i feel like getting one more. I love animals. I once had a bunch of hamsters, mice, and turtle. I have fishes too but they're my sister's. I'm not inetersted in fishes because i can't pat 'em. However, there's some exceptional. I used to pat my Flower horn last time. But it's dead now. The new flower horn (which also died already) we've bought later bites. So, i guess i'll just stick with land animals alright. I love my Bunny very much. I'm very very fond of her. I think i'll be the saddest person on earth if she dies... My pigs are cute too and they're super fat! I'm willing to spent lots of money on them especially my Bunny. I got her two years ago when her old owner doesn't want her through my friends. She gets jealous very easily, so i'm thinking if i really should get a new rabbit. If my house's bigger, i'll have tons of 'em. Haha..That's just impossible -.-" My dad dislikes furry animals. He say my lungs are filled with furs 'cos i get too close with my pets. I rather die of fur filling my lungs than being highly exposed to passive smoking. -.-" So, i hope and pray that my mom will allow me to get another rabbit. Maybe a white one this time. *pray hard* Any comment on this? Should or shouldn't i get one????? I can't decide!!! Argh~
Harriet flying off~

2006-06-06T15:24:00.000+08:00

After about 5 hours of waiting, i got a fever
My day yesterday started when i woke up at 6.30 am. Then i've got myself all prepared for a quite important day - taking my driving test on around 7.00 am. Uncle called...he'll be 30 minutes late due to some problem - waiting for another GUY to get prepared i suppose -.-". Obviously he woke up late or there's some other lame excuses. Waited with my Bunny till 7.35 am..And finally...they're here. Rushed down, got myself into the small kancil which only can fit 4 person including the driver. It's really small. Hmmm...reach PJ. I didn't see the time but by then i think it's around 8 am. Then got my documents, gave my ic and L license to the uncle...yada yada...8.30 am. The worst is that JPJ counter is still not open. Isn't the working hours from 8 to 5? 8 means 8 o'clock only get ready or get ready by 8? Malaysian DO have some problems...The place was packed with people eagerly wanting to get their number.There's even kids there. Wonder what were they doing there?! I was starving as i didn't eat anything before i came. Then me and tt went to the place and lined up. First timers got to get their number first. Oh boy...i was glad to hear that. After that, we went to the canteen as that small "hut" or whatsoever you call them was full with candidates. Food!!! Hungryness crept all over me and got worse when the tempting smell came fill the air... I bought some fried rice which cost me RM1 and drank the mineral water i bought earlier. While i was eating, the test finally started. On the road only~ They announced some numbers...But mine was not announced neither is tt's. So..we waited...The clock ticked and it's 9.30 am. Tick Tock Tick Tock...10.30 am. 11.30 am! our numbers wasn't announced yet! i think when it was almost 12 finally...we heard "number 39" being called but not 40! Mine was 40 and tt 39. Boy..i was left out! The other guy was the first to do the road test. There's this futoi onna JPJ who seem to like to fail people. Thank god i didn't get her! She drove a few people back already... I was to do my slope test first though. At around 12 too ^^. Smoothly, i passed my slope, parking, and 3 point turn. Yay =D Then suprisingly, not long after that, i was called up to do my road test. It was embarassing when i used the wrong gear on the highway! ><" That JPJ made me panic. Luckilly my car didn't stop and he didn't ask me to get down. Phew! Earlier, while i was adjusting the back mirror, he was talking to his friend and he gave me a cross on that! How can he...but who cares, i passed! And so is tt! Yay...we can drive to school already. But tt willingly volunteered to be my driver..wahahaha-FOC! yay! heh..Oh ya, when i did my slope test, while i was trying to get my car to move - i've got a kancil which the air cond is hot! i was sweating like a pig alright. I didn't free the handbrake and smokes was emmiting like crazy - that's what tt saw. Haha...In conclusion, i've spent a large porpotion of my day waiting, waiting and waiting. I hate to wait. I will feel so sleepy. That's the reason why i wasn't really scared during my test. I was bored to death! Plus the weather =( I was so tired when i got home, that the first thing i did was sleep. I slept for like 3 hours and woke up with a headache. A pretty bad one. Took a warm bath and ate my dinner...My dinner wasn't nice. Mom only cooked her favourites. So i ate merely plain rice. T_T. Headache getting worse. Ate some boiled "fanshu" as dad wasn't feeling well too. Is it me or the weather in Malaysia sucks? Headache is still killing me...but i refused to take medicine. Decided to go to sleep. I just woke up not long ago (around 7) and i went to bed at 9! I was half asleep alright till 11.00 pm then i really slept. I couldn't stand the pain so i took 2 panadols before i went to bed. T_T at the end, i didn't do anything else except passing my driving test yesterday. So lame right. Was supposed to tag along with tt to do his considered-as-last-minute-shopping but i'm glad i didn't go or else i'll be the half-dead slave of the day =S. And this morning, i woke up at 10.30 am. haha..more than 12 hours of sleep. I do feel better already...heh..that's all Harriet flying off~

2006-06-04T13:37:00.000+08:00

Depression strikes after laziness
Holidays here and the first week is almost gone. For the first few days, laziness struck me. I was sooo lazy that i won't even move my butt. It's not that i stayed on my bed for the whole day la. That's disabled. I was just too lazy to do my asssignment and homework. Yesterday, finally i got my PA assignment done but until Eva reminded me, i still have another PA project. Work seems to be piling up. I haven't done my maths homework yet. Anyway, After those days of being lazy, finally i feel like i'm on the line again but then, *great -.-"* i'm damn depressed this few days. Very very depressed. I have never feel like this before. It's due to some problem of my own. Anyway, thanks to my friends, (tt, cs, pang, wlau, and those who are concerned) i am feeling better already. Hopefully it will end soon. I don't want to be like this all the time. It's somehow pathetic. It's saddening. I hope that i can smile the way i used to. Depression cause a person to feel moody all the time, feel stressful and all sorts of negative feelings. Anyway, there's something good also, (i think...) i don't get panic easily. Is that good? Perhaps. Anyway i'm gald that i have my friends. Love you guys ^^. I guess i'll blog again some other time...
Harriet flying off!~

2006-06-04T13:25:00.000+08:00

Drive carefully
Hello to da world...
It's 1.25 pm now and i've just came home not long ago from my last driving lesson and had lunch with my mom. My days lately hasn't been very well. Anyway, driving lessons come first. Yesterday, for the first time in my 14 hours lessons, i bang the pole at the parking space. I was so spaced off. When i was driving to the Safety Driving Center, i almost got myself in an accident. But it wasn't my fault. Uncle's car got scratched a lil at the front though. I feel so sorry. The black myvi came straight from the back when i put left signal and half way turning. I actually stopped right at the middle of the road! It's terrifying. Luckily i was too depressed to panic. SO, everything went on normally. Then today, while doing the slope, i almost got backward from the highest point. Omg...why am i doing all these mistakes when my driving test is actually tomorrow? I do hope that everything will go on smoothly tomorrow especially when i am required to get ready by 7 am!!! Tonight must sleep early. MUST! I don't want to go there with my blur face...should i do some exercise before i go? Heh...joking. I was a total noob when i started learning. I get panic very easily. Especially when my dad taught me. He says that i have bad quality so..i'm not going to let him teach me anymore. I rather pay -.-" than get scolded. He is so still and with his "serious" face starring at me all the time, there's no way i can stay calm. One time, when i almost bang something, he grew much more panic than me. hehe... So, pray hard hard that i pass tomorrow...and remind myself not to bang the "tiang" anymore ><"
Harriet flying off~

2006-06-02T16:23:00.000+08:00

Up and Down
Aloha~
It has been a very down day yesterday. Since i woke up about 9 something in the morning till i slept at around 12. I also not sure what time i slept =S I guess it was another lame days i had before i sat for my spm. Oh well or maybe it's because i haven't finish my assignments yet and my MATHS homework!!! Sigh..somehow, i don't feel like doing...not even now. However, today i had a better day. Hehe... for the first time in my life, i baked cookies... i burnt some though. It wasn't entirely my fault that it burnt because i think my oven has something wrong with it. Somehow after a few hours of baking 'em, i feel really satisfied and happy... It doesn't taste that nice but i'm still happy with it. Although i bought the dough instead making it myself like i planned...But..hahahaha still happy =D Hope that everyday i'm like this then my life will be very satisfying. minus the pile of homework waiting for me. -.-" Ganbate fly! gah....have to get my butt moving already....
That's all folks...Harriet flying off~

2006-05-29T10:43:00.000+08:00

New Life, New Blog

Hi my friends...
This is me starting a new blog as the one i had in friendster last time was totally rusted. That's because i didn't even bother to update it. It's just seems so boring to me. Oh well...new lifestyle has started and i think it's time for me to start a new blog. On 15th of May 2006, Form 6 schooling session started. Me? Who never bothered to apply for any scholarship or colleges, endeed up in SMK (L) Bukit Bintang. Orientation week is what the first week is called. But, the weird thing is i don't feel orientated at all =] I've finally or perhaps randomly made up my mind to study bio-chem. My class is the biggest one among the three lower 6 classes and of course the most fun one too. Sadly on the first day, or maybe for the rest of the days, i'm the only girl who's from SMK Bandar Sunway...People must be wondering..what happened to all the girls in my school huh?! haha...Happily...all of 'em went to college. Ok, back to my new class. After like a day, i start having new friends! YAY! =D Mostly girls as there's 29 people in my class and 24 are girls...haha
"i don't feel like i'm in a boy school at all." That's what tt always say for the first week...
But after that, he who was from a co-ed school fit in pretty nicely among the girls...haha
Can u take this as a compliment? hehe...
Oh well, during the first week i was tired everyday as my lifestyle totally switched. -especially my sleeping hours! hmmm...i guess that's all for my first post.
Goodbye people, Harriet flying off~